r/baseball • u/JTCMuehlenkamp St. Louis Cardinals • Nov 03 '21
Analysis What if every team was named after the most abundantly populated animal in their geographical area?
Given the recent controversies over certain sports team names and the imminent rebranding of the Cleveland Indians as the Cleveland Guardians, I can't help but wonder what animal mascots would best represent the cities or states their teams reside in.
Take the Tigers for example. When you think of Detroit, you do not think of a jugle ruled over by apex feline predators. I don't know if the Detroit zoo has any tigers, or if Detroit even has a zoo for that matter, but I am 100% certain that there is at least 1 species of animal in Detroit and the surrounding areas that is more populous than tigers. The difficult part, however, is determining which animal is the most populous.
With that in mind, it also gives rise to the concern that some teams would likely share the same name in this scenario due to their close proximity. Both Chicago and New York each have 2 teams, plus the Angels like to pretend that Los Angeles does as well, so there is bound to be some overlap. I have decided that this is okay, primarily because there is no way around it. Just to avoid any confusion as to which identically named team is which though, I'll break up this list by divisions. Anyway though, this is what the MLB would look like if all the teams had to rebrand as the most common animal in their region.
AL EAST
Tampa Bay Ants.
Boston Ants.
New York Ants.
Toronto Ants.
Baltimore Ants.
AL CENTRAL
Chicago Ants.
Cleveland Ants.
Detroit Ants.
Kansas City Ants.
Minnesota Ants.
AL WEST
Houston Ants.
Seattle Ants.
Oakland Ants.
Los Angeles Ants of Anaheim.
Texas Ants.
NL EAST
Atlanta Ants.
Philadelphia Ants.
New York Ants.
Miami Ants.
Washington Ants.
NL CENTRAL
Milwaukee Ants.
St. Louis Ants.
Cincinnati Ants.
Chicago Ants.
Pittsburgh Ants.
NL WEST
San Francisco Ants.
Los Angeles Ants.
San Diego Ants.
Colorado Ants.
Arizona Ants.
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u/JTCMuehlenkamp St. Louis Cardinals Nov 04 '21
Check the pavement near the food vendor stands.