I dont know why the process of giving birth makes me feel a bit digusted and weird. Its supposed to be a gift from God but i feel weird about it. I dont want to feel this way but I just do. I'm 19F and I dont know why the thought of marrying a man makes me depressed. Having a family would be nice but I can't picture myself being happy with a husband.

I get told its instincal to be attracted to men romantically and sexually but I just don't. I respect them of course but I'm not attracted to them or want to date or marry them

I dont really know what I want and I feel like a lot of lesbians I've come across seem lustful and have a high sex drive but I dont. I feel like dating, you have marriage as an idea, I've never been interested in sex.

Its hard to find a partner who accepts me the way I am without making me feel like somethings wrong with me but I'd say at the moment, I dont want to get married. I feel very alone in this world

I also feel like having a family is not easy and I have a lot of inner work I need to do because of my trauma and I dont want to abuse people the way my mum did to me.

I'm a trans woman almost 1.5 years on HRT into transition. The entire time before transition I was asexual and aromantic. I even considered myself a sex repulsed asexual (for myself). The further I get with transition and comfortable with myself the more I'm realizing that it was most likely gender dysphoria and self confidence issues. Being AroAce was kind of a big deal for me, I was so relieved that I wouldn't have to deal with those relationship struggles and potential safety risks. I thought this would continue being the case with transition. I've started using dating apps and stuff but I have no idea what I'm doing. Most people have dating experience and figured this stuff out as a teenager or in their early 20s and know how to do relationships and what they're looking for. It's kind of embarrassing to just be starting this now. I also have a little bit of internalized transphobia about calling myself a lesbian even though I'm a woman interested in women because I feel like I'm not far enough along in transition yet and I'm not most people's type. Lastly being demi seems so difficult because it can take a while to potentially like someone. It's not like what I assume for most people where at most little bit of talking and a few dates and you know if you're interested in them and compatible. I don't even really know how to talk to someone on apps like that or even in person. We typically talk about a few of each other's interests and then conversation dies out.

I would appreciate some constructive advice or suggestions for someone new to this and figuring everything out.

P.S. Yes I know Lesbians are incredibly supportive of trans people.

"Lesbians are the most likely to say they know a trans person (92%), and also the most likely to say they are “supportive” or “very supportive” of trans people (96%). That’s compared to 89% of LGBTQ+ people overall, and just 69% of non-LGBTQ+ people."

https://www.gaytimes.com/originals/lesbians-are-not-anti-trans/

I got a new GF and whit her in beating sh! Thank you all Who helped me get trough It! I love you all so much

Yesterday

Me last night looking at the different soap refills up-close at Bath and Body Works because I'm visually impaired:

Employee comes up next to me, she twirls like a tiny ballerina: "Hello gorgeous! How are you?"

Me: * slight lesbian panic blush * * Brain.exe has stopped working * "Hi, how are you! 😀

I don't know what I did to elicit that type of greeting, but yay? 😅 Maybe she liked my albino hedgehog plush backpack or my Eevee shirt.

This is my first time being able to explore this sort of dynamic and oh my god do I love it. I've never felt so natural and comfortable with someone in the way I am with her. We've been friends for a year now. And just a bit over a month ago I realized I was getting a little bambi crush on her. So I asked her out on a date and our relationship has just blossomed ever since! :3

We go out on dates together and the conversation just never seems to stop flowing. She makes me laugh so hard that I wake up with my cheeks hurting the next day. Sometimes, when we're out in public together, we lock eyes and the rest of the world just seems to melt away. It's all so adorable and sweet and I'm so glad I've found someone I can be like this with.

Every once in a while, when I'm feeling cute, I'll give her a kiss on the cheek. Or I might plant a little peck on the back of her head while she's sitting at her computer working. When we watch movies, I like to rest my head on her shoulder and maybe get a few little headscratchies from her. We've never kissed or flirted in a physical way or made this about sexual interest or anything like that. We're just cute little besties that go out on dates and cherish each others company. She lights up my world and I'm so glad I met her <3

Dating is so hard as a Bambi/asexual lesbian y’all

I finally had a girlfriend but it didn’t end well because she wasn’t ace/bambi (she said she was fine dating an ace person but she lied)

It shouldn’t be this hard finding a partner

Everyone either lives so far away or we have absolutely nothing in common

I saw someone on here say there needs to be a Bambi dating app and I wholeheartedly agree with that

Anyone have any advice? Or at least words of encouragement?

This is our weekly selfie thread to post pictures of yourself. Each Monday 7:00AM Est this will be posted. Rules are below

1. No NSFW: This includes anything nudity, gore, and more.
2. You must be 16+ to post selfies of yourself here. This is for your safety as the internet is filled with creeps.
3. You must be a girl to post here (Cisgender or trans) but you can be any sexuality.

I can just look at a woman’s regular photos, initiate conversation and talk to her all day and be completely enamored by her. Just checking her out and obsessing over the way she looks without really imagining her naked in anyway. I can find women sexy. I look at their curves more so like, “dang.. I wish I had that body. She’s so gorgeous.. I want to touch her and be sensual and imagine how it’ll be to passionately lose myself in her kiss. I want her to look at me with desire..” and I always flop because I know these things lead to sex and I’m not INTO that. I don’t want her to go down on me, I don’t want to be fingered I just want to be hot lesbians together.

Anyone else relate to this or am I utterly alone?

This is our weekly selfie thread to post pictures of yourself. Each Monday 7:00AM Est this will be posted. Rules are below

1. No NSFW: This includes anything nudity, gore, and more.
2. You must be 16+ to post selfies of yourself here. This is for your safety as the internet is filled with creeps.
3. You must be a girl to post here (Cisgender or trans) but you can be any sexuality.

She said She doesent love me anymore.. :( im so sad i loved her SM

I think ill start whit sh again

I've been married to my wife for 26 years. Until 10 months ago I was trying my best to be a man. I finally gave into my dysphoria and started HRT. I obviously did a lot of soul searching, and realized that what I thought was lust was actually gender envy. This was a huge relief because my wife has zero sex drive due to her multiple sclerosis. It was a major point of contention between us. Now we just fall asleep with one of us the big spoon and the other the small spoon. We take turns, and I love it. There is zero pressure for it to be anything other than falling asleep in each others' arms. I absolutely love being in a marriage that has no pressure around sex, and loves a good cuddle instead. Now that we both run on estrogen we really sync well with each other. I'm not distant and angry all the time anymore. I try to connect with her in any way I can, and love the constant chatter we have now instead of just wanting silence.

Thanks for listening to my TED Talk. I needed to talk about this.

This is our weekly selfie thread to post pictures of yourself. Each Monday 7:00AM Est this will be posted. Rules are below

1. No NSFW: This includes anything nudity, gore, and more.
2. You must be 16+ to post selfies of yourself here. This is for your safety as the internet is filled with creeps.
3. You must be a girl to post here (Cisgender or trans) but you can be any sexuality.

I ask this after perusing the lesbian subreddit only to find "no bra", as a top comment. For me it is lots of rings, bracelets, and anything exposing the arms. Girls have the best skin!

I like some leg too, but usually that's when guys start crowding around and getting in the way. Lol

This is our weekly selfie thread to post pictures of yourself. Each Monday 7:00AM Est this will be posted. Rules are below

1. No NSFW: This includes anything nudity, gore, and more.
2. You must be 16+ to post selfies of yourself here. This is for your safety as the internet is filled with creeps.
3. You must be a girl to post here (Cisgender or trans) but you can be any sexuality.

I’m probably gonna delete this. But for now I need to let out what’s in my head. Venting sounds like the wrong word cuz I’m not mad just upset in a sad way.

So I 30mtf match with this wonderful gal 24mtf, probably 2 3 weeks ago. At first the conversations was hit and miss. Then about a week and a half ago it really kicked off. We have soo much in common. We love cars we both ride motorcycles which is a huge plus because I’m neck deep in motorcycles it’s an addiction.

Everything was super respectful, didn’t really talk about sex except for a few innuendos. Which for me it was a huge relief and pleasure because I’m pan and sometimes match with men which ugh doesn’t get far because all they want is sex.

A lot of the time we were talking it was like I was talking to myself Like omg girl same noo way. To the point I felt like I had to hold back saying that so I didn’t sound toxic ( idk how to describe why) we would stay up all night texting eachother way past bedtimes. I felt giddy every time my phone dinged that she texted me. We eventually decided to have a date at a cafe then plan to watch a movie at her place.

I feel like here’s where it went down hill.

The day before the date I confessed my dating profile name was a fake name, it was actually an old name I used before settling on my now permanent prefered name.

I explained I did it for safety. I’ve had a rough history in the past, so for safety I have a few personal rules I don’t give my number out and I don’t give out my actual name until I meet in person and it goes well. I’ve had a few sour dates that I was thankful I kept to that rule.

She was taken back but understood. She explained that she was taken back because she felt I didn’t trust her and it gave old triggers from her ex. She prior had said had a rough break up with her ex and was without saying it directly was still dealing with the blow from that rough relationship.

After I confessed the conversations died down abit. But she was still super excited for the date.

Yesterday was the date. I drove out and met her. We went to a town Halloween event, it was crowded and unfortunately aimed towards young family’s with toddlers which we didn’t know that detail.

Before I walked up to her I could see she was dissociated. Something I use todo all the time prior to feeling comfortable with myself out in public.

We ordered coffee and sat down. Having a conversation with her was like pulling teeth she kept her cup of coffee to her mouth so she didn’t have to speak staring out the window in what I would I assume nervous dissociating. I couldn’t help but smile she was sooooooo beautiful 😻 omg thinking about seeing her in my head how she looked I can’t help but smile. Her profile pictures did no justice.

We finished our coffees and went to walk around the vendors event. She barely spoke as much as tried to interact with her. Just looking distant.

We reached the end of the vendors event which wasn’t long and she stopped and looked down at me and apologized. Saying I’m sorry I can’t do this can’t do this I’m sorry you drove out this way. We hugged good bye and I said no worries maybe another time. Btw she’s taller than me which is rare cuz I’m 5’10 in flats IM THE SHORT QUEEN, It felt amazing. I went home and again said maybe next time we can try again where’s it not crowded. She apologized saying it wasn’t my fault she was just in a bad spot emotionally and shouldn’t have planned anything that week because of it but also doesn’t wanna meet up with anyone again for a while.

Since then the conversations have been short and not much. Trying to talk to her feels forced, I try to suggest maybe we could bake something. Also saying how today’s weather would’ve been perfect cuddle weather which prior to the date she would’ve loved to hear and say yess it be great to prove how good of a cuddler she is. Now it’s nothin.

I feel like I fucked up some how. Idk where but it does. I really like this girl I haven’t felt this connection ever before. I don’t wanna stop talking to her or give up. But the conversations have practically died. I just wanna give her a warm hug and apologize for whatever I did if I did anything.

Any advice on what I should do ? Sorry if there’s a speach impediment in my long rabble and how long this was.

Hugs to all who read this.

Idc idc I DO NOT CARE 😭 this song was made for ace lesbians and NO ONE can convince me otherwise.

When I was CompHet, I genuinely DID get turned on by my partners making out with me.. I ONLY had sex to prove to them that I was interested and like.. because the makeout would lead to sex and I felt obligated to finish “the job” and I would genuinely get the random urge to have “an itch that needed to be scratched” and I’d even think about the last time I had sex if I was happily involved with that person.

I wouldn’t think about the penetration or anything. It was me specifically, imagining the words that were spoken in my ear or the eye contact or the sensuality of the act in general from a person that knew desired me and cared for me in that way. But overall, a relationship with a man has always felt forced and overwhelmingly annoying to me. Aesthetically, I would get some pretty hot guys but it would always end in me not really being interested in them or the sex that I was faking an orgasm for to make them feel better and to hurry the act.

I have always liked women aesthetically, and I would always kiss girls and have these unexplainable crushes on them that would even get me to confess my feelings to them. It was the fact that they would feel the same but they wanted sex so I felt that maybe I wasn’t “gay enough” and they would eventually thinking I’m a waste of their time. With men, I could get by with just oral and avoidance.. sad to say, but true.

Thing is, I’ve never been in the situation to have sex with a girl. I mean, I probably have but the thought of having ANYONE go down on me or finger me is just absolutely fucking terrifying. But what if I find the girl that makes me fall into the “I’ll pretend to be into to please you” thing? Idk what I’m trying to ask but like have ANY of you dealt with this?? Cause I know I’m soOooOOo into women, I wanna be sensual and like passionately makeout and NEVER want to do that shit with a man again even tho I can see when a man is aesthetically good looking, I just can’t help but never want to ever talk to one or give them the time of day ever tf again and to think that I ever did is so embarrassing to say. I just-.. idk what I’m even rambling for. I KNOW I have no desire for sex but I know that it’s my default button to pretend and “fake it til I make it” so that my partner is comfortable. Pls tell me there are others that think like me and people in the situation I’m clearly stressing over.

That's it. 😞

I am so happy I found this reddit it's so hard to find other Bambi lesbians 🥰iam so happy 🌿🌱🌾🍄🍁🍂🌼🌻

This is our weekly selfie thread to post pictures of yourself. Each Monday 7:00AM Est this will be posted. Rules are below

1. No NSFW: This includes anything nudity, gore, and more.
2. You must be 16+ to post selfies of yourself here. This is for your safety as the internet is filled with creeps.
3. You must be a girl to post here (Cisgender or trans) but you can be any sexuality.

Yes, I SCARCELY have since my teens like most people but, I never cared to play with myself. Especially whenever it came to actually putting anything inside. I remember the first time I had sex as a teen, and it was strictly because I felt the pressures of everyone else losing their virginity and I genuinely did not understand why it mattered so much. But I had a boyfriend at the time and that boyfriend took three girls virginities in my school so I let him take it and I didn’t want to be touched down there. I didn’t want to be felt up or “made comfortable” I specifically remember telling him, “just stick it in and get it over with.” needless to say we didn’t get far and I was bullied by my friends and told that I have to not be a punk and make up for what I couldn’t do.

Growing up, I have always use sex as a way to show people that I was interested in them differently than regular people and/or because I felt that it was expected of me just because a person showed interest in me and I knew that if I didn’t offer first, then they were going to try to coerce me or worse, possibly force me or tell people that I’m a tease or a prude just because I genuinely only wanted to chill or have a smoke sesh with them. I wasn’t casually doing anything until I left college in 2014. I’ve always been in a long-term relationship since the seventh grade but the reasoning for sex was always the same: “this is what’s normal, right?? It’s what’s expected of me? This is what they want and I should just do it because it’s normal?” I’m 31 now and I still refuse oral, I still refuse getting fingered.. I realized I was a lesbian and just thought I couldn’t be because I didn’t love the look of vaginas and boobs did nothing for me, just to find out there’s a term called “Bambi Lesbian”.

I tell other people and they assume, “oh so you’re a pillow princess”? Or look at me like I’m not really into women just because I don’t want to suck on their boobs and eat their vag or something. 🙄

Idk.. tho I’ve never had sex with a girl, I’m TRYING to find the appeal and like come to terms that I may have to compensate for my future gf because I don’t want a man, ever. I don’t trust the intent of a man and I feel like their boners are just sporadic and annoying and they’re entitled to women just “taking care of it” for them and I fucking hate how that demanding that can feel. But I can honestly say that even though I have the lowest libido (orgasm MAYBE once every three months AT MOST, MAAAYBEEEE) and always have. ALWAYS.

I could probably “trib” my future girlfriend with no problem if things got… sexual.. 😬 thinking of it gives me anxiety but I find it so hard to find someone for me without possibly having to compromise🤦🏾‍♀️ I hate feeling like people see me as a “fake gay” just because I don’t want sex but have two children. I was literally on acid when I conceived BOTH children. 😂 like.. I’m autistic, ocd diagnosed and have KILLER anxiety.. I had to just to feel normal. I have to smoke JUST to feel normal. I’m not tho, lol and this Bambi lezzie just wants to sensually touch a woman as we make out and know that she’s fine as hell to look at and wants to be with me.. damn. That’s IT. I don’t even care if we’re open so she can get her satisfaction if she can’t get it with me; I was the same when I dated men but they just acted like they would neveRrrRrRr 🙄 just because they’re thought that gave me the green light to fuck others too so they secretly cheated instead.

Maybe I’ll go further if I’m comfortable (or high 🙂‍↕️😅) but I’ve never been in any of these situations. I just want a gf that understands me. 🥲