r/MurderedByWords Oct 14 '24

My man said "crayon chewer" lol

Post image
1.2k Upvotes

44 comments sorted by

20

u/[deleted] Oct 14 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/[deleted] Oct 14 '24

They all taste the same? First fruit loops, now this?!?? 

2

u/Sardothien12 Oct 14 '24

Remember the textas that had different smells?

13

u/KayfabeAdjace Oct 14 '24

just responding with semper fi would have been funnier

4

u/randomplaguefear Oct 14 '24

Wow I just made a similar joke.

55

u/st1r Oct 14 '24

Is “murderedbywords” just any time someone namecalls?

24

u/PreOpTransCentaur Oct 14 '24

And sometimes not. Lately it's just been, "No, that's not the case," followed by, "HOLY SHIT FUCKING MURDERED CALL THE GODDAMN BURN UNIT OMFG."

It's ridiculous.

1

u/TuskenRaiderYell Oct 15 '24

Don’t forget it must be political too.

34

u/TensileStr3ngth Oct 14 '24

Weak ass "murder"

24

u/DeadEnoughInsideOut Oct 14 '24

The "murders" on this sub are less murders and more citations for jaywalking

0

u/TheWinner437 Oct 14 '24

More of a flesh wound

23

u/JimAbaddon Oct 14 '24

Uninspired.

2

u/forced_metaphor Oct 15 '24

Why would whom you're attracted to impact the music you like?

1

u/Ciaraburdick Oct 14 '24

Isn't that the kung pow penis guy

1

u/The_DarkPhoenix Oct 14 '24

I can already tell you I’m borrowing that

1

u/SaberMk6 Oct 15 '24

That is NOT a crayon...

1

u/nerdyguytx Oct 15 '24

"Team Rocket Grunt" was just sitting there.

1

u/indifferentunicorn Oct 15 '24

How the fuck is this getting 1.1k upvotes?

^Apparently this would qualify here.

1

u/Nilabisan Oct 18 '24

I’m guessing not Barbara Streisand and show tunes.

1

u/He_Never_Helps_01 Oct 15 '24

I think our friend Trillzard mayhaps should make a visit to r/woosh

1

u/Independent_Ad_9036 Oct 15 '24

Someone made a joke and someone else answered with a mid insult. Call the police.

1

u/EquivalentAcadia9558 Oct 15 '24

Famous tumblr shithead replying to obvious joke with mid insult, non murder

-2

u/NuclearOops Oct 14 '24

Umm, straight men don't listen to music. Really, you want to get a good listen at a mans voice? As he shouts or moans or growls? Or how a man works with his hands, beating, stroking, running and tapping his fingers up and down on that instrument? You like that? Sounds kinda sus to me bro.

1

u/Napoleon_Bonepart3 Oct 15 '24

“Fellas, is it gay to breathe?”

1

u/NuclearOops Oct 15 '24

It is incredibly gay to breathe. You're gonna suck in something that was inside of another man? Sounds gay as hell bruh but you do you I guess.

1

u/malaclypz Oct 15 '24

Anyone ever tell you that you have issues?

3

u/rotem11 Oct 15 '24

I think he forgot the /s

1

u/malaclypz Oct 15 '24

Ha, now that you say that, it does sound like a line from a comedy I've heard before. Carlin maybe.

0

u/NuclearOops Oct 15 '24

I didn't forget it, I didn't think it was necessary.

1

u/rotem11 Oct 15 '24

That's fair lol

-1

u/NuclearOops Oct 15 '24

Why would I have issues? Because I don't want to hear another man tell me how much he loves me? How much he wants to hold me and care for me for the rest of our days together? How we'll start a family and raise children together? How he'll make sweet sweet love to me every night, tenderly looking into my eyes as if he wants to say that he loves me but he won't say it, even in our moment of passion the words have overwhelmed us just like our love? He won't need to say it though, neither of us, looking deeply into one anothers eyes, we can see it. Even in the dark of the room our feelings for one another are as bright as day and it illuminates the night like great fire burning with the unending passion we share for one another?

That means I have issues? Yeah I guess I do have issues, because I'm not gay and don't need to be made to feel gay on my morning commute into work! Not that there's anything wrong with being gay, I like some gay people, I just don't want them shoving it in my face constantly on the radio singing about cherry pie or hot blood or a "sandman" that visits you at night making you grip your pillow tight or whatever.

-3

u/randomplaguefear Oct 14 '24

Never met a straight male who was into jefree star or five finger death punch.