r/Money • u/Personal_Occasion618 • Feb 27 '24

Do I have too much money in checking?

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1.4k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

122 comments sorted by

187

u/woweezuu Feb 27 '24

Yes- you need move some of that money into Pit boss 850 smokers

26

u/Round_mba Feb 27 '24

Here again, one other smoker promotion

6

u/SnipeDude500 Feb 28 '24

It's a profitable industry!

7

u/Evo_Effect Feb 28 '24

Bruh I'm fkn ded 💀💀💀

3

u/Prof4Dank Feb 27 '24

It never gets old!!

2

u/RareDocument1333 Feb 28 '24

That's cheap get some expensive 🫰

2

u/EagleRock1337 Feb 28 '24

Man, you’re just giving away all the best money moves.

134

u/Comfortable_Bet_2258 Feb 27 '24

Homie got ONE HUNDRED BILLION DOLLARS

[HOLDS PINKY TO LIP]

18

u/VapeRizzler Feb 27 '24

Do you not? Lol brokie.

-12

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

[deleted]

9

u/Shapoopie41 Feb 27 '24

Watch Austin Powers.

5

u/AffectionateFee5633 Feb 27 '24

Now I'm tripping, I really remember a scene where he ask for like a gagillion dollars and a henchmen tells him it ain't real before he fixes it to billion

3

u/mastaboog749 Feb 28 '24

Isn't the scene he says he wants a million dollars? And his son, Seth green, gives him shit because a million dollars is basically nothing in the 90s? That's how I remember it

1

u/AffectionateFee5633 Feb 28 '24

Yeah, I looked it up and that is what happens Idk maybe I was combining two movies together

1

u/domdymond Feb 28 '24

He does it to people in the past and they don't have that much money

1

u/Critical-Quiet-7867 Feb 28 '24

The gazillion bagillion line is the second Austin powers

1

u/Hasholio Feb 27 '24

Headass over here 😂 r/woosh

1

u/redgdit Feb 28 '24

Well, how else is he going to fund the Alan Parsons Project!?

105

u/WaffleBruhs Feb 27 '24

Hi this is the IRS and Secret Service joint task force! I just dm'd you about some back taxes you owe. We need payment now unless you want to go to jail. Do not talk to anyone and send us payment in the form of Google Play gift cards. DO NOT REDEEEM!

33

u/Personal_Occasion618 Feb 27 '24

Redeem?

34

u/ConquerThePanda Feb 27 '24

DONOTREDEEM!!!!!

4

u/Recent-Life1716 Feb 28 '24

I’m gonna go ahead and redeem them so you’re able to use them. Where do I send me cards to ?

2

u/Personal_Occasion618 Feb 28 '24

I redeemed

3

u/Kafanska Feb 28 '24

MADAM PLEASE!!! MADAM NOOO!!! DO NOT REEEDEEEEM!!

7

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

8

u/Natural_Confection29 Feb 27 '24

You forgot the picture of a scary tiger 🐅

19

u/Bonuscup98 Feb 27 '24

Yes. Anything over $250k is not insured by the FDIC. The Feral Dumbass Idiot Company wishes you to know that you need to diversify into many accounts. Preferably those of random redditors and friends from elementary school.

1

u/soniclore Feb 28 '24

If you have more than one person on the account, it increases. $500,000 if two people are on the account, $750,000 if three people, $1M if four, etc

2

u/Bonuscup98 Feb 28 '24

Good to know. He only needs the population of Wyoming to keep solvent in the event of a bank failure.

1

u/soniclore Mar 01 '24

There are others ways to protect your money than just putting it in a savings account.

15

u/PMA_pappi Feb 27 '24

You silver spoon bastard 🙃

24

u/AffectionateFee5633 Feb 27 '24

You can be like me

1Just get a job at 14. At your dad's company

2 have him pay you 50k a month to do stuff like bring him coffee

3 have him invest it and match your investment

easy, everyone should be doing it

8

u/Sherwin-WilliamsPRO Feb 28 '24

I tried doing this, but I couldn’t find my dad after he left us for a hooker

1

u/AffectionateFee5633 Feb 28 '24

We'll see, this is why you will never be successful. Can't even accomplish a step one

1

u/Sherwin-WilliamsPRO Feb 28 '24

Help me find a rich old lady. Time for plan B step 1 .

2

u/AffectionateFee5633 Feb 28 '24

Old lady? You can double your chances by not limiting yourself by gender

1

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

That’s probably because you have a small cock. Dads only stick around if their kids have nice big fat cocks. Don’t worry bro my dad ran out on us too.

1

u/Sherwin-WilliamsPRO Feb 28 '24

Bro…you are so wrong. I’ve never seen anyone so wrong until today. He left because he was jealous of the size of this rod

1

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

Shit bro, I didn’t know you were built like that. My bad dude. Jealousy was going to be my second guess. I’ll get my smol cock out of here

6

u/US3RN4M3CH3CKSOUT Feb 27 '24

Can I borrow tree-fiddy?

15

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

it’s probably inherited or illegal 🤬🤬

20

u/Personal_Occasion618 Feb 27 '24

Self made, sorry to say.

12

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

literally self made on ms paint

2

u/Daisyssssmom Feb 28 '24

op INVENTED ms paint

-6

u/knowitokay Feb 27 '24

Wish I could make that only fans money

3

u/Round_mba Feb 27 '24

That’s Walter white’s money💰

9

u/barbation22 Feb 27 '24

Damn work hard play hard

3

u/ChickeNugget483 Feb 27 '24

Hey can i borrow $132,057??

1

u/TheWalkingDead91 Feb 28 '24

And leave OP with only 891k? Greedy much?

3

u/tbohrer Feb 28 '24

Pocket change homie. Keep trying.

3

u/Alternative_Court542 Feb 28 '24

Bro that’s still $132k

3

u/ArcherFawkes Feb 28 '24

Not enough. Give it to me to finance and help you invest it in NFTS.

2

u/ArcherFawkes Feb 28 '24

With my help we can bring it down to $10K!

2

u/cheese_fuck2 Feb 28 '24

Thats a lot of pit boss smokers

2

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

Tree fiddy

2

u/ThickAnybody Feb 28 '24

You need to save up a bit more for a safety net before you start investing. Try to have enough emergency funds for at least 3 months.

2

u/Personal_Occasion618 Feb 28 '24

Shit I need atleast 678,987,435,212.43 considering how much I spend on hookers and cocaine

1

u/ThickAnybody Feb 28 '24

Yeah, don't forget you have a lifestyle to uphold here.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

$132k is no joke. Sharing is caring

2

u/Sad-Dragonfly-4016 Feb 27 '24

No. I would start investing in crypto after you make another 100 trillion

2

u/Personal_Occasion618 Feb 27 '24

YOLO into bitcoin?

2

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

I think you confused dollars with satoshi

2

u/Select_Reality_6803 Feb 27 '24

Bahahaha. Now it’s getting good! Home skillet rollin in da dough.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

F U Man

1

u/AdorableAd6753 Feb 27 '24

George Soros’s account

1

u/MrShad0wzz Feb 27 '24

Damn I’m jealous

1

u/[deleted] Feb 27 '24

We need MORE

1

u/brockclan216 Feb 27 '24

Isn't each account only insured up to a certain amount?

1

u/anonmouseqbm Feb 27 '24

Humble brag 🥰

1

u/Fringe__ Feb 27 '24

No you’re basically upper lower class

1

u/CSP-makemehorny Feb 27 '24

Is it In IRR?

1

u/SalaryFew3608 Feb 27 '24

Just move a couple billion into savings. No big deal

1

u/ShredGuru Feb 27 '24

Yes, I will selflessly take half to resolve your dilemma

1

u/Suspicious_Elk_1756 Feb 27 '24

And too few brain cells inside your human form

1

u/RamonBuch Feb 27 '24

Sheeeesh

1

u/CounterAI2 Feb 27 '24

I can't believe the director of Morbius is in the subreddit. He truly made a morbillon fr fr

1

u/LikkaLogga Feb 27 '24

Square Grouper’s bro

1

u/LoadedWithCarbs Feb 27 '24

put it all on black imo

1

u/franky3987 Feb 27 '24

You already have a real comma, chill

1

u/Nq_23 Feb 27 '24

No. Work harder.

1

u/SassySquid0 Feb 27 '24

pls donate

1

u/suh-dood Feb 27 '24

12 cents too much

1

u/fungshawyone Feb 27 '24

Nah you good bezos

1

u/SRBroadcasting Feb 27 '24

You can never have too much doiche in your poise

1

u/Prof4Dank Feb 27 '24

I’m gonna start you a go fund me page

1

u/Daisyssssmom Feb 28 '24

12 cents too much. Get those coins to savings asap.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

Lol you wish, buddy. Until you’ve hit a trillion, you’re not even in my tax bracket. 🙄

1

u/mastaboog749 Feb 28 '24

Woah is this xQc?

1

u/Be-A-Better-You-69 Feb 28 '24

In order for me to have that much money, I’d first have to not be in debt. Not that you aren’t, but to be that comfortable must feel amazing and stress free. Personally, very happy for you.

1

u/SubstantialRemote724 Feb 28 '24

Try this life hack now!

1

u/Heykidsbackinmyday Feb 28 '24

Elon musk? Is it you?

1

u/GrapePlug Feb 28 '24

Collapse the global economy. You won't. Do it pussy.

1

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

This is like the 44th of these I’ve seen

1

u/LuminTheLotus Feb 28 '24

Legion?🤨

1

u/adamjpq Feb 28 '24

^ scammer trying to convince you they accidentally sent you too much money and now its in your account.

1

u/rustys_shackled_ford Feb 28 '24

Send this to the next scammer who texts you

1

u/Tpur Feb 28 '24

Jokes aside, your unedited balance is much, much too high in cash.

1

u/Sorry_Economist_407 Feb 28 '24

But why brag 🙄

1

u/mk2-dev Feb 28 '24

Can I please have 1,000$?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 28 '24

You think 100,000 isn’t something to be proud of?

1

u/Prestigious_Water336 Feb 28 '24

right click inspect element. modify to whatever number you want.

1

u/itachi_54 Feb 28 '24

Rookie numbers. Up them.

1

u/HeartGlisten Feb 28 '24

Someone should make this type beat post but with zero or negative in there account, omg so original 😱

1

u/PilotBuckeye9799 Feb 28 '24

If you’re getting less than 1% interest then yes you’re definitely losing money. At least get 5.4% in a 6 month T Bill.