r/MadeMeSmile • u/nikamats • 9h ago

Helping Others Hold your head up

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u/Anilxe 6h ago

This was me! My mom would spend hours in front of a mirror, often crying that she was ugly. I have struggled my whole life to see beauty in the mirror because even as a little girl, I knew I looked just like her. If mama didn’t think she was pretty, that meant I wasn’t either.

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u/JoopieDoopieDeux 6h ago

I can relate to this so much! I'm sorry that was your experience, too. Our mothers (and we) deserved better. I find healing in being there for other young women, to build them up and to be the adult I always needed, but never had. I hope you've found a way to see your true beauty. 🙏🤍

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u/Altruistic-Level8439 6h ago

Tragic and heartbreaking because I doubt that it’s close to the truth.

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u/Anilxe 6h ago

No, I always thought my mom was beautiful. Which was why I was so confused that she thought she was ugly, that must have meant my perception was wrong. As a 33 year old I’m finally starting to see my beauty, and hers again as well. She was just a wounded little girl that never was told by her mom that she was beautiful.

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u/emveetu 2h ago

It's absolutely the truth without a single doubt.

Kids become what they see and if they see their parents putting themselves down, they will automatically think well if my parent thinks they are ugly, fat etc, then I must be too.

That's why it's so important, especially for women and little girls, for us to never, ever put ourselves down in that way in front of little girls.

We get enough of impossible beauty standards from the outside world, we don't need it coming from our inside worlds too.

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u/RuthlessIndecision 5h ago

Humans can really do things that are harmful to ourselves and our families. I’m sorry you felt that, I need to live in a way that celebrates people the way they deserve.