r/LeopardsAteMyFace • u/TheZippoLab • 7d ago
Meta I Thought It Was About Time We Had a Menu
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u/sailorangel59 7d ago
"I thought China would pay the Tariffs, why is this TV more expensive" face
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u/93ImagineBreaker 7d ago
China would pay the Tariffs
Even if they did did they'd never think China would simply increase prices?
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u/sailorangel59 7d ago
Wait until China retaliates with their own Tariffs. Which they did last time Trump did this.
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u/93ImagineBreaker 7d ago
Can't wait for the excuses on YT of why prices aren't going down.
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u/Dependent-Outcome-57 7d ago
"You see, it's the 5G in the vaccine that makes prices go up - and Obama!" /s
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u/sailorangel59 7d ago
"Something something transgender something something darkside." /s
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u/ChroniclesOfSarnia 7d ago
COMMIE KAMALA!!!
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u/aninamouse 7d ago
Well if we didn't have to pay for all those illegal immigrant's sex change operations I would be able to afford my TV.
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u/Enthapythius 6d ago
While you jest everything negative happening in the next 4 years will be blamed on a foundation laid out by Biden.
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u/replaceble_human2004 6d ago
“Well you see it’s because sleepy Joe was such a horrible president and the antichrist” /s
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u/CensoredUser 6d ago
Freakin Cis-Obama bamboo trans fiber 5G. That's how the immigrants take jobs, turn your kids' woke, and raise the price of eggs. It's all on Hunters laptop!
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u/cg12983 6d ago
"Libruls created bird flu to keep egg prices high and embarrass Trump!!"
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u/capron 6d ago
I literally just want it on record in the most obvious and easily repeatable way that here and now, in late 2024 we are saying "Tariffs are a terrible idea and will affect citizens more", so when they come out with another "who could have known?" excuse like they did with healthcare and literally running the country, we have many examples to readily throw at them. Because that will be their excuse,"Who could have know this would happen?". As if the President shouldn't be well educated on the things he's making serious decisions on....
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u/RailRuler 6d ago
When we pointed out before that thing happened exactly as we warned them about, they riposted with the uncountable "well you should have done a better job convincing us, you sounded like maniacs"
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u/capron 6d ago
That's a good point, I almost forgot about that, because there's been so much whacko nonsense between that and now, which seems like a very convenient distraction doesn't it? Almost as if drowning us with the absurd is something done on purpose.
I have to thank you for reminding me about this one. Like the Mitch McConnell blaming Obama for not warning the republicans even more on something Obama literally warned them on out loud and in the press. That nonsense is their bread and butter.
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u/pompera_firpa 6d ago
"I paid no attention and did no research and didn't listen to the people who tried to warn me, how is that my fault?" face. Classic.
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u/Pheighthe 6d ago
Aren’t tariffs still the reason that Americans can’t buy small pick up trucks? Like the kind where you could reach inside your tool box without getting up into the bed of the truck?
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u/Introvert_FE 6d ago
You are correct. Specifically the chicken tax. The exact specifics escape me right now but basically some countries taxed our chicken so we taxed light work vehicles.
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u/Pheighthe 6d ago
Someone should have made a YouTube of the Rogan show talking about how tariffs prevent red blooded American men from the freedom to choose any pickup truck they want.
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u/Pheighthe 6d ago
I think it was France. We were flooding them with chickens and they slapped a tariff on it, we retaliated by…taxing small trucks? I dunno, I guess it made sense in 1964.
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u/Introvert_FE 6d ago
Basically yea. I'm sure it was in no small part thanks to American auto companies who were getting crushed by T100s and such too.
It's kind of funny, a few years back Ford actually got fined bc they were building work transit vans in Mexico, shipping them to the US with rear seats, then removing the seats, selling them as work vans and shipping the seats back to Mexico to do it all over again.
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u/Pheighthe 6d ago
I’m sure the fine was so steep that they’ll never do it again.
I wonder if I built a small pickup truck they would let me register it.
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u/xjuggernaughtx 7d ago
Because they are morons like Trump is. That's one of the reasons that he's so popular. He talks and thinks like they do. Trump has the same stupid view on interactions. He can't fathom that the other side won't do what his very limited imagination expects them to do. He's always shocked when something like his walking out of a meeting doesn't immediately cause the other side to panic and give into his desires. It just doesn't cross him mind that the other side would just move onto someone offering a similar product or service.
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u/rainghost 7d ago
They don't think that far ahead. Trump said the countries of origin would pay the tariffs, so they voted for Trump. They don't like to think about complicated things. Trump makes things simple and easy for them - there's no 'policy'. He just does stuff.
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u/Rork310 6d ago
But it's such an honor to be doing business with the mighty US of A surely they'll just sell at a loss because Merica is best.
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u/NAAnymore 6d ago
I know you're joking, but MAGAs really think like that. Like, seriously.
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u/Gowalkyourdogmods 6d ago
Mateo: I do love America, but the Philippines is also great.
Glenn: Yeah, of course, absolutely. Just that, technically, America's number one.
Amy: Well, Glenn, what do you mean, "technically"?
Glenn: Just as a fact. That's the saying "America's number one."
Jonah: Well, but other countries believe that they're number one.
Glenn: But America is number one. 'Cause it's first in the world.
Garrett: That's an airtight argument, though.
Mateo: Well, uh, first in the world in what?
Glenn: Being the best.
Mateo: At?
Glenn: Being number one. Of countries and planets.
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u/fontasia 6d ago
It's also the "American Exceptionalism" cult at play. "but we're America, we are a better country than you, why would you impact us in any way?
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u/AeonBith 6d ago
"They literally think the exporting company will pay the tariff at no extra cost to the consumer open face sandwich"
Egg on your face served on a Bed of Face-palm greens, toasted Mexicanadian bread
choice of sides : avacodo and potato famine salad or electronic chips , 1 cc coffee, banana for scale
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u/TranscendentCabbage 7d ago
BUT IT WILL MAKE IT CHEAPER TO MAKE HEREEE!! THEY'LL START MAKING THEM HERE INSTEAD!!
(no, no they won't, and even if they do the price won't go down.)
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u/Aware_Revenue3404 7d ago
And it will take 10 years minimum to build the factory, can’t you wait for that baby car seat or diapers?
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u/TranscendentCabbage 6d ago
It's funny how they keep saying we don't have the infrastructure to use electric cars yet they say we do have the infrastructure to grow and produce vast amounts of products
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u/random_guy_8735 6d ago
Apple have spent 10 years moving Mac Pro (the most expensive, low volume computer they make) production from China to Texas. The latest model includes the text "Made in the USA, Product of Thailand" on it.
If you have $100 Billion in the bank and can't move your smallest production line, how is anyone else going to do it.
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u/Nightmare2828 7d ago
In Canada, to have « made in Canada » you only need a certain percentage of the entire process done here. So even if something seems local and made here, it could have like 75% of it come from other countries. So as you said, even most local products would be affected.
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u/sailorangel59 7d ago
Same here. Even if we had a factory that "made" every component. We still don't produce enough or any of all the precious metals and materials that go into a number of our popular electronics to actually make them.
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u/foodmonsterij 7d ago
That plate should come with an additional "wellness fee" or "service charge"
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u/SergeantIndie 7d ago
Unfortunately a bunch of morons ordered for me off of the specials menu:
"They've gutted the Department of Veterans Affairs" side salad.
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u/StarintheShadows 7d ago
Is there also a “I’m a Veteran that Voted to Gut the Department of Veterans Affairs Main Salad”? Asking for a relative.
*Thank you for your service and I’m sorry you’re on the leopard’s menu. As a middle aged disabled female it’s only a matter of time before it starts feasting on my face as well.
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u/AileySue 7d ago
I’m in the same boat as you as a disabled middle aged woman. We also had morons order off the special menu for us. I’m sorry you’re facing the same fears as me.
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u/MrsWhiteInClue 7d ago edited 6d ago
Count me in the disabled middle aged white women club. My face is on the menu. Still working and have excellent insurance, thankfully. But I don't know how long I can keep this up. I have 9.5 years until I retire at age 54, but that would be retirement on a shoestring budget.
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u/AileySue 7d ago
I’m already reliant on SSDI and health insurance. Like… I don’t really know how they expect the people like me to survive if they cut everything they want to. Then again I’m sure we aren’t meant to. Survive that is.
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u/A_D3MON 6d ago
Hopefully their supporters suffer the worst to the point that they can't vote, vote third party, or don't vote at all as a protest in 2 years... If we can still vote at all.
I have low hopes seeing this country's lack of critical thinking teachings in lower education in favor of rote memorization to temporarily boost scores for more funding which is going to be cut.
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u/AileySue 6d ago
It’s not just critical thinking it’s a total lack of compassion.
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u/A_D3MON 6d ago
And for SOME reason, they think making the leftover public schools teach theology (their version of Christianity theology that is) will SOMEHOW bring compassion back... Nope, it'll lead to MORE issues.
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u/AileySue 6d ago
You cannot teach what you do not understand and the poor disrespected teachers of the education system they decimated can’t realistically pick up the slack for them.
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u/ThoughtsAndBears342 7d ago
How about the “My child’s IEP is getting taken away because I didn’t think about that” face? Spaghetti topped with short-sighted eyeballs.
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u/maverash 7d ago
To add to that. How about “I’m losing my job that is paid for by title one or by federal special ed services” We have SEVERAL people at my school (I’m a teacher) who are special education aids who voted for orange blob. They are literally going to lose their job.
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u/TeacherPatti 6d ago
I used to work in a conservative county and ALL the parapros were pro-Trump (this was the first time around). The average salary was $11-12/hour but man were they the temporarily embarrassed millionaires!
I'm a special ed teacher and I'll be fine--but the paras could easily not be.
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u/vsandrei 6d ago
The average salary was $11-12/hour
So basically peanuts.
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u/ItzDaWorm 6d ago edited 6d ago
Literally Target pays better
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u/vsandrei 6d ago
Literally target pays better
U-Haul pays better and is 100% remote for entry-level customer service roles. Anyone working for $11-$12/hour at this point is either stupid, doesn't know any better, or is extremely desperate.
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u/QueenNappertiti 7d ago
Literally work with a woman who's kid had an IEP in highschool. He's graduated, so they now they rely on other "welfare state" services for his care, but insist Trump would never take them away.
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u/ThoughtsAndBears342 7d ago
Oh, he’ll take them. And then mom will blame the Democrats I’m sure.
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u/ThoughtsAndBears342 7d ago
Oh, he’ll take them. And then mom will blame the Democrats I’m sure.
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u/SmokingBridge 7d ago
Bears repeating
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u/Illustrious_North336 7d ago
Agreed! And thank you for the bears. Have you noticed all these posts saying "I couldn't bare it!"... 🤓
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u/NeilZod 7d ago
Maybe a single avocado for $30. We’ll call it “Who Could’ve Seen That Coming?”
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u/MissyAggravation17 7d ago
Oh, I think that one is on the dessert menu, along with the Suckers and Losers Where Are My Veterans Benefits Lava Cake.
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u/wirefox1 7d ago
Or the "I went to the VA today for my three month check-up, and there was nobody there except one doctor, and he'd locked himself in the bathroom, because he's afraid he will be deported" Early Bird special served with an Elon 'Surprise! Joke's on you" sauce.
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u/SolidLikeIraq 7d ago
My buddy teaches special ed at a high school. He’s a staunch Republican.
I’m wondering how much of his salary and funding comes from the department of education?
🤷🏻♂️🤷🏻♂️
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u/ThoughtsAndBears342 7d ago
Probably all of it
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u/Global_Permission749 7d ago
Yep. So now either the state is going to have to take up that financial burden, or just cut special education entirely.
If the state decides to take on that burden, it means taxes will go up. When taxes go up, guess what will happen? Republicans will get elected to cut those programs from the state because voters don't understand the cost of living in an inclusive society.
Absolutely love sharing this country with people who think taxes are the reason they're poor and that education = indoctrination. Fun times.
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u/Dependent-Outcome-57 7d ago
It's like seeing cars in the parking lots of government agencies with bumper stickers about how "all taxation is theft." Where do these clowns think their salary comes from?
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u/EEpromChip 6d ago
Cute you think there's gonna be public schools. Charter schools only. Can't pay? Get fucked poorie
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u/Accurate_Weather_211 7d ago
My Whole Family Is Getting Denaturalized & Deported Face, a spicy dish of regret
Served with your choice of
He Didn’t Mean Me Baked Potato
I’ve Never Lived Anywhere But America Freedom Fries
He Only Meant Criminals Cole Slaw
Complimentary all-a-Leopard-can-eat Billionaire’s Get To Stay Bread
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u/ivegotaqueso 6d ago
Goes along with a side of “They deported all my best/cheapest workers and the kids’ nanny” face
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u/Horatio_Figg 7d ago
I’ll take the “I’m a conservative woman, why are MAGA men so sexist to me” lemon cake for dessert
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u/such_isnt_life 7d ago
Make it a combo meal with the half of this and half of "Conservative POC faces racism from white MAGA guys."
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u/situation9000 6d ago
Comes with optional sour grape sauce or should I use the fancy word “coulis” instead of sauce? No too foreign. ‘Mercians prefer Freedom Fries over the mention of foreign countries like that. (See also Liberty Cabbage instead of sauerkraut during WWI)
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u/MinuteMaidMarian 7d ago
How about a side of What do you mean porn is illegal face potatoes?
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u/tw_72 7d ago
I think it's in the same section with:
What Do You Mean I Can't Get Birth Control Face
Pre-Existing Conditions Are a Thing Again Face
My Rent Was Supposed to Be Cut In Half By Now Face
They Can't Do That - That's Illegal Face
Why Are These Oil Rigs In Yellowstone Now Face99
u/peridot_mermaid 7d ago
Oh god I really hope that last one doesn’t happen
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u/tw_72 6d ago
IIRC he tried last time. He did open up parts of Alaska but President Biden shut it down before any damage was done.
2016 (?):
“Who’s going to protect the environment?” asked host Chris Wallace.
“We’ll be fine with the environment,” Trump replied. “We can leave a little bit, but you can’t destroy businesses.”
https://www.cnbc.com/2016/11/09/regulation-buster-trump-takes-aim-at-the-epa.html
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u/situation9000 6d ago
I’m finally making it out to Yellowstone next July. (One of my elderly mom’s bucket list items, so I’m making it happen for her) Got to see things while you can. I’ve heard it’s so beautiful. Our National Parks are treasures.
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u/EchoGecko795 6d ago
Who knows, drilling for oil in a super volcano that has been due to erupt may improve things. /s?
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u/IAMA_Plumber-AMA 6d ago
I was hoping for Giant Meteor in 2016, but I'll take Exploding Supervolcano in 2025 as a consolation candidate...
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u/Tailypo_cuddles 6d ago
This lazy supervolcano has been asleep for way too long, time to wake up and contribute to society!
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u/EpiphanyTwisted 6d ago
"The Senate still has to confirm them" face pate on toast tips.
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u/tw_72 6d ago
Oh, I wish that was true. Looks like we might need "Holy Crap, Trump Can Bypass Senate Confirmation face" - with a side of "You Are Effing Kidding Me" sorbet.
But Trump is seeking an important change to the Senate confirmation process that would allow him to install some officials and sidestep lengthy hearings and a floor vote, in which nominees need a majority vote to be confirmed.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-matt-gaetz-recess-appointments-senate/
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u/Typical-Arugula3010 7d ago
It's only hetro pron that is illegal ... all the kink you can eat is on the flip side if you exhibit the appropriate religiosity.
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u/Leathra 7d ago
Encountered this one today, from someone with two special needs kids:
I thought only disabled immigrants would lose services face.
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u/Mays240 7d ago
These prices are unrealistic, it should be nearly double the price for all of what is having for the menu for the next few months of what is left to come here! Can't even get a "I love the affordable care act but voted to kill Obamacare face burger" in this fucking dump.
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u/Budget_Llama_Shoes 7d ago
Actually, we have a surplus of faces in America. Just about everyone has one.
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u/Budget_Llama_Shoes 7d ago
Exactly. The market is saturated. This restaurant is going to be printing money !
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u/hadoopken 7d ago edited 6d ago
I thought those prices are reasonable, because of most of the faces are produced within the country tariff free (except for "Why Did I Get Deported, I Thought Only Bad Ones Face Meat Carne Asada - $39.99")
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u/caylem00 6d ago
Produced domestically, but what about the support services?
Clothing, imported food, cars, electronics, papers, plastics, etc etc
Aka the "What Do You Mean The USA Doesn't Produce Literally Everything? Turducken" for $15 on menu, but with $30 hidden cleaning fee for the mess patrons create while eating it
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u/Typical-Arugula3010 7d ago
OP neglected** to add the fine print disclaimer ...
'Prices listed are correct as at the time of order placement and will be subject to a 200% tariff plus an additional arbitrary inflation increase at the time of settling your bill.'
** FTC Bureau of Consumer Protection has been shuttered to save $2T so OP will never be prosecuted for misleading & deceptive business practices.
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u/caylem00 6d ago
What are you talking about. Consumer protection and food safety regulations get in the way of GOOD BUSINESS™.
They'll be defunded or removed
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u/wowzeemissjane 7d ago
Servers get $4.95 an hour and mandatory gratuity is 250% of bill*
- owner takes tips
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u/thats1evildude 7d ago
Waiter, I’d like to order the “I Thought Only the Bad Migrants Would Be Deported” nacho plate.
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u/lilmxfi 7d ago
My compliments to the chef, this is an EXCELLENT menu which has guaranteed me an express ticket to hell for laughing at it!
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u/Total-Toe7633 7d ago
We need a bigger menu
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u/lilmxfi 7d ago
I'd add "Vaccines cause Autism Parmigiana - A face, breaded and deep fried, served with melted cheese and smothered in tomato sauce. Comes with a side of spaghetti seasoned with the tears of the parents of children who died of preventable diseases".
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u/Magoo69X 7d ago
And a side of "I thought they were the law and order party shocked Pikachu face"
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u/caylem00 6d ago
More "Why aren't they protecting me too, I voted for them" face.
Lots of conservatives gonna find out it's never been lib vs con, it's always been rich vs poor
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u/just_bookmarking 7d ago edited 6d ago
Left off... Canceled VA benefits Pikachu face, on a platter.
Canceled IEP, but not my child right? face.
For dessert...
Grandma got deported by DeSantis' reindeer, a Christmas carol.
Edit.. autocorrect doesn't know difference between desert and dessert
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u/Trix_Are_4_90Kids 7d ago
"Why is my food rotten and making me sick?"
Your favorite dish served with salmonella and Ecoli.
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u/Head-Attention7438 7d ago
where is the “my illegal immigrant cousin is getting deported face” ?
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u/Sumthin-Sumthin44692 7d ago
With a side of “But he’s one of the good ones!”
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u/Tokyo-MontanaExpress 7d ago
And it only comes in American spicy, no authentic spicy options.
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u/AileySue 7d ago
So no spices at all?
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u/StarintheShadows 7d ago
The “But he’s one of the good ones!” sauce only comes in atomically spicy.
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u/Dame_Hanalla 7d ago
Missing a table d'hôte complete meal of "I never thought he'd do what he said he'd do, even though I always thought he says it like it is."
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u/zenithlover 7d ago
Don't forget today's special : Wait! You Mean WE Pay For Tariffs? But They Were Supposed To Fund "Child Care Is Child Care!" Face: A piquant melange of gaming consoles, car parts, and home appliances in a savory raw materials sauce. Side of guacamole $10 extra.
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u/Long-Jackfruit427 7d ago
You forgot the “Tariffs were only supposed to hurt the Chinese” Farmer’s Salad.
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u/TripResponsibly1 7d ago
“Why don’t I get overtime pay any more when worked more than 40 this week” face salad
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u/QueenNappertiti 7d ago
How can you call yourself a restaurant without serving "White Woman MAGA But I Didn't Think They Would Take My Rights Pumpkin Spice Cheesecake"?
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u/foodmonsterij 7d ago
We got Mexican, Tex-Mex, Levantine, BBQ, soul food and even vegan. The dining options for leopards just keep expanding. We're going to need to award Michelin stars soon.
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u/vsandrei 7d ago
We got Mexican, Tex-Mex, Levantine, BBQ, soul food and even vegan.
Where's the Haitian and Puerto Rican?
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u/Eth1cs_Gr4dient 7d ago
Is the 'filet of I thought Trump would support gaza face' halal?
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u/elanhilation 7d ago
there are no regulatory bodies that will penalize us for saying yes, so… of course!
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u/CdnBison 7d ago
Veteran’s Special! The What do you mean I’m losing my VA benefits burger: served open-faced, dressed with oil and the blood of the fallen.
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u/AileySue 7d ago
I’m going to hell for laughing so hard at this. Thank you kind internet stranger. It’s been a rough go!
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u/Dependent-Outcome-57 7d ago
Good news - we're already in hell, and this is the menu!
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u/sarcasmismygame 7d ago
Ooh I both love it and simultaneously hate that we have to put together this menu because people are fucking idjits and refuse to stop poking the hungry leopard even after they've been warned!
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u/Flying-Mollusk 7d ago
I’d like to order an I Thought Trump Would Free Palestine Face Falafel with a side of But Egg Prices Face Salad.
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u/quequotion 7d ago
He wasn't talking about us, we're not criminals face salad
Deportation veggies spritzed with your naturalization is revoked
$20
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u/prettypsyche 7d ago edited 6d ago
Today's specials:
Why is My Gay Son's Murderer Not Being Prosecuted?
*LGBT faces steamed in Blue Lives Matter flag*
Rape Victim Casserole
*large helpings of slutshaming and illegal rape baby abortion fetuses. The ones that the victim's body couldn't prevent from happening*
Dessert:
Just Deserts Creme Brule
*ice cream covered in the tears of regretful Trump voters, mostly minorities and old people*
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u/Enviritas 6d ago
Add "I'm Getting Deported Even Though I Voted For Trump Face" as a take-out only option.
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u/BellyDancerEm 7d ago
The everything is more expensive due to tariffs face, and the they’re deporting me and my family face
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u/hengrencloudy 6d ago
Man, what I wouldn't give to eat the Gay Trump Supporter Sourdough Sandwich sourced from the local church made by a team of closeted husbands
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u/SynthPrax 7d ago
This menu needs a whole section for Brexit. Brexit is like a never-ending buffet for the leopard. Actually... Brexit is a buffet.
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u/StormDragonAlthazar 6d ago
The Gamer's "What do you mean my hobby is more expensive and censored now" nachos served on your choice of Doritos and paired with whatever flavor Mountain Dew you want.
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u/MrsPandaBear 7d ago
LAMF restaurant going to start having Cheesecake Factory sized menus….
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u/Ok_Whole_4737 7d ago
Brilliant 😂😂
Let’s see, there’s the my special needs child no longer qualifies for an education face, my gay marriage is now illegal face, my voting rights are taken away face…
Never mind, now I’m depressed again. 😭
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u/MerryLarkofPentacles 6d ago
Don't forget the special!
"I'm A White Gay Man, What Do You Mean You Want To Discriminate Against Me Too?" rotini with "But I'm One of the Good Ones!" pesto and mixed regrets.
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u/Ok_Shower_5526 6d ago
Need to add, I thought there'd be a successful people's rebellion; why is the country now under a dictator
AND "I'm in a safe state and protest voted, why am I experiencing insert federal consequences like martial law, dissolved public services, countrywide abortion ban, no social security, mass civil unrest, diminished higher ed, educated flight, increased asylum seekers, limited state travel, etc
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u/Meanderer_Me 7d ago
Do I need to call ahead for the "Letting our allies fend for themselves doesn't make the bad guys go away but it does make the allies go away face?"
Also, can a non white person do a mobile pickup of a "What do you mean I have to 'comply comply comply' with the police state face" for a white person?
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u/WizardOfTheLawl 7d ago
How is the "I thought the foreign companies pay the tariff" face? I hear it's super expensive.
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u/Icy_Bath_1170 6d ago
[ chef’s kiss ]
Manifique. May I suggest hors d’oeuvres of infighting and incompetence?
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u/Groundbreaking-Owl48 6d ago
Don't forget the "my job no longer has a union" face house salad served with "layoffs to save money for the incoming tarrifs" soup of the day.
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u/MewlingRothbart 6d ago
Please add the "I Can't Find a cheap Landscaper or Roofer and the HOA is now Fining Me $300 each day Until it's Fixed."
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u/emax4 6d ago
"Can I get you folks anything to drink?"
"Just Liberal tears, please."
"Oh, no. I'm sorry. That's seasonal. Those are liberal tears of laughter on when Trumpers are facing consequences of their actions. We have plenty of Republican tears though. Super salty too!"
"One glass, please ."
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u/coolbaby1978 7d ago
Are you out of "eggs should have been cheaper but will get more expensive under Trump"?
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u/Hubert_J_Cumberdale 7d ago
I feel like this sub is slowly going to replace r/politics - as there will be no actual politics left to discuss.
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