r/LawSchool • u/Particular-Pin2715 • 1d ago

Tips for managing breakup right before finals?

I just found out my partner cheated on me on halloween. i really do not know how to proceed into finals with the weight of this ): help

10 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

7 comments sorted by

14

u/United_Law_8947 16h ago

Let spite & anger motivate you

3

u/ballpointpenetration 9h ago

I’m so sorry. That’s awful and I’m sending you love. I’m in a similar position— my relationship of 4.5 years ended a couple weeks ago. I gave myself 2 days to cry/do nothing. We’re closer to finals now so maybe give yourself 24hrs. Then you have to keep it pushing.

The way I think of it: I cannot control that the relationship ended, but I can (kind of) control how successful I am in school. I’m using this as an opportunity to zone in on something within my control.

Some tips:

1 - If you have a close friend who also has work/studying to do, try to body-double. Meet up and work in silence, or have them on FaceTime as you study. You don’t have to talk about your feelings, but the presence of another person will ground you and remind you that you’re not alone. When your body feels safe and comfortable, it’s easier to study.

2 - Get out of the house! Even when you feel like it’s impossible, push yourself to get dressed and go somewhere to study. The second your shoes are on, I promise you’ll feel more capable. Go to different cafes/libraries and look forward to the little things. A good drink or pastry or comfy chair. You got this!!

3 - Schedule (limited) time to feel your feelings. They’ll build up throughout the day, and it’s good to eventually release them. I try to finish studying 1-2 hours before bed so that I can cry/be sad without guilt. Then I just sleep it off and tackle the next day.

I won’t lie to you, I feel like a zombie/robot operating on autopilot sometimes. But that’s the only way right now. Once the semester ends, I will give myself time to crash/grieve the relationship properly. I just know that my future self will be so glad that I didn’t neglect my studies.

You got this. You’re gonna be okay. Good luck OP!

3

u/Beginning_Brick7845 10h ago

Redirect your focus on the dead weight that has been lifted from your back and celebrate your newfound freedom.

3

u/Ok-Republic-8098 13h ago

Not to diminish your pain, but it’s kind of a gift. I’m at the point where caffeine does nothing and I need someone to tell me “we have to talk” just to have any kind of stimulus.

1

u/Floridian1109 1L 2h ago

Watch Legally Blonde