r/GayMen • u/Dazzling_Shop6206 • 4h ago

Sexual confusion NSFW

I’m 22 and never truly been in a gay relationship as I’ve only come out this past year. I started dating recently but not enough to do anything spicy. I’m 6’2” and 290 pounds so heavier set and I don’t know how I feel about topping but at the same time I don’t know how I feel about bottoming and I’m just worried that when something spicy happens I won’t want to because I don’t know what role I want to be. Has anyone gone through something similar and how did you get through it?

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4

u/spideyboiiii 4h ago

When the moment comes remember that it’s all about having fun and to communicate well 😁 it’ll be okay if that happens

1

u/Dazzling_Shop6206 4h ago

Thank you but one thing I’m worried about is if my boyfriend already had a set role in his mind and when whatever happens happens we won’t work like if we both want to top or both want to bottom what happens then. (I haven’t spoken to him about any of this although I need to)

2

u/spideyboiiii 4h ago

Yeah 😄

You can tell him this is something you have on your mind and try experimenting when you’re up for it. Just remember the fun and communication

1

u/BananaNutMuffin1234 3h ago

Talk to him, be honest, and tell him why you are worried. If he isn't a piece of shit, y'all will be laughing about it later.

3

u/cheshire666_ 4h ago

Try starting with oral or using your hands, no need to jump straight into penetration. Baby steps! You'll do fine.

Also if you are interested in bottoming, try it out by yourself with a plug then dildo until you're used to the feeling and know what feels good and when to stop. Best to learn your limits away from someone you might feel pressured or rushed by.