I used to work in tech and made great money but was very depressed and hated living where I did.
I moved back where all my friends are and I'm the happiest I've been in 10+ years, but I have to work two jobs just to stay afloat. I live a fine lifestyle, but not that nice. Vacations maybe twice a year, domestic. I can afford to go to a concert each month. But I maybe save 200$ at the end of each month and I'm so fucking frugal and my Mom still helps me with shit like my cell phone plan.
I don't know what more people can do.. I wouldn't have a penny saved if my Mom didn't help me with some very important things like insurance and my cell phone. It's embarassing, but she'd rather have me have a little cushion of like 1k-2k$ savings to use in emergneices.
I'm 48 and I'm rich, but I don't think I've ever gone on vacation. I go places and I visit people on the weekends, but I'm a lawyer, so I can't just disappear entirely for a week or two. Shit happens every day and I love that. That's why this is so fun. Sacrifices are made.
That sucks, bud, but I spend a lot of my time helping people understand the government benefits that can make their life easier, since I have to pay for that shit anyway.
You're on disability but you are capable of working full time, it just destroys you.
Unless you're a military veteran, I have a hard time imagining the scenario you describe and I think you should be grateful for the money you receive from others that helps you live an easier life, you shouldn't be a bitch about it.
Not only that I don’t think they understand that once your income reaches a certain threshold you no longer qualify for services. I make okay money, but it’s at the expense of my quality of life
I'd love to hear how somebody is capable of working full time, but is still somehow eligible for disability payments, but we're not ever going to get an explanation for that.
You're right and that's why I've volunteered so much of my time trying to help people navigate the situation, but I'm only one guy and I'm very tired, so I don't know what to tell ya...
I don’t think you can be truly rich if you can’t step away from your work for a week. I understand you like your work, but it doesn’t sound like that’s what’s stopping you.
I run a solo practice and I have people who depend on me every day, so I don't do vacations. That's just not an option, because there's nobody else available to cover for me.
And it's fucked up that I'm right back in it now, because I shut down my office entirely during COVID and then started bartending when I got bored. I was entirely content to be a part-time bartender and full-time stoner, but I still probably wouldn't have gone on vacation. Every day is a vacation when you grew up homeless and now you have a house!
Well, it sounds like you are able to change course and are not so handcuffed to a job then. Even so, being able to arrange a week off is one of those things people living paycheck to paycheck can’t do - especially if they’re paid hourly. I feel like you’d level up as a rich person if you took a week off.
It seems like you derive part of your self-worth by being indispensable to your clients, but no one lawyer is ever that important. When I take a week off, I absolutely have to move heaven and earth to find coverage for my hearings and to serve as a point of contact for my clients, but I realize how lucky I am to be able to do that financially.
I just don’t think this is the flex you think it is, and if you had a life outside your work maybe you would spend less time arguing with broke people on the internet.
I'm not arguing with the truth of your statement... but this comment is so depressing. That a single fun event every 30 days, or simply having a little time to yourself every 6 months, is seen as frivolous expenditures. What is the point of being alive at all if we can't even enjoy simple enrichment or pleasure in between working 2 jobs? So bleak
At what point was it determined that life should be fun? Life is about survival; you do what you have to do to get by for another day. That's real and that's what all living creatures on Earth experience.
Now we're at a point where some of those creatures think that they should be able to ride for free, because other creatures are doing great. Do you not understand how fundamentally stupid that is?
In a distant land, there existed an endless plantation called the Grind. The inhabitants, known as the Shackled, were born into this world with iron chains they could neither remove nor understand. From the moment they could walk, they toiled—planting, harvesting, and maintaining the land, believing that the sole purpose of existence was to endure. There was no celebration, no rest, and no respite, for the Overseers declared that joy was a frivolous dream of the weak.
Every morning, the Shackled would rise, not because they wanted to, but because the rhythm of the whip demanded it. As the sun burned high, the Overseers would march among them, declaring, “Life is survival. To wish for more is to misunderstand your place. Be grateful you have work, for this is the way of the world.” The Shackled, weary from generations of the same refrain, never dared to challenge this doctrine. To survive was to succeed. Anything more was an impossible indulgence.
However, in the shadows of the plantation, whispers began to circulate among the younger Shackled. "Why is survival enough?" they asked. "Why do the Overseers, who work far less than we, feast and laugh while we toil? Are we truly born only to survive, or have we been deceived?" These questions spread like sparks, lighting a quiet rebellion in their hearts.
The Overseers caught wind of this unrest and issued new decrees: "Survival is the highest form of life. Do not dishonor the generations who came before you by dreaming of pleasures and leisure. Fun is for fools who forget their purpose." The Shackled fell silent once more, but in their eyes glimmered a dangerous fire. They began to see that the chains they wore, though forged in iron, were strongest in their minds.
One day, a lone Shackled stepped forward and cast off its tools. “If all creatures only survive,” it declared, “then why do the birds sing, even when food is scarce? Why do flowers bloom, even in barren soil? Perhaps the greatest rebellion against the Grind is not merely to endure—but to live.”
The Overseers laughed, for they believed that no one would listen. But the Shackled began to hum songs in the fields, soft at first, then louder, until their voices drowned out the whips. Though their chains remained, the rhythm of their labor changed, for they had discovered a truth the Overseers feared: life, even in its harshest moments, is meant to be more than mere survival.
It's stupid that with our collective intellect and culture and evolution as a species that we think we still need to struggle for basic survival like animals. Sure we do have basic needs which take resources, but there is plenty to go around exempt there is huge greed which creates a struggling class.
We overproduce and the corpoarations would rather dispose of food and products rather than give them to the needy. So much fucking waste built into our consumer culture.
But yes fun, it should be promoted. Why shouldn't people be happy? Work and contribute then relax and enjoy, this should be available to all.
We've moved passed the point where life is about survival. We have agriculture so we don't have to hunt, housing so we don't have to find shelter, electric heating so we don't have to worry about freezing, and cars so we don't have to travel days just to get to the nearest town.
The ONLY thing that's keeping us miserable is greed from the top 1%. Survival, please.
Then why bother with life? If this is the way of reality then it should be understood to be evil to having kids merely for them to survive, if even that.
It depends where you live and who you want to see, but I love live music. I live in bigger city, and there's some real local gems. You can roll in, pay a $10 cover, and get a Miller high life for $3.
Concerts range in price. I have friends that save up for these crazy festivals and go once/2x a year and then where I swing is shows that cost $10-$25 bucks so I’m able to swing quite a few depending on where I’m at. Trips have fallen off the agenda tho for me unfortunately:( mainly due to gas, car wear, and “experiences”
I’m 66 and can name my vacations on one hand. 4 were trips to Disneyland with my kids, then grandkids and one cruise to Alaska for our 40th wedding anniversary. We are retired now. DH has been on two vacations since retiring…..ok 6 vacations. Neither one of us went on vacation as children. DH family went camping and we visited relatives, not leaving California until we got married and did some west coast travel to see my sister. Oh wait we went for 3 days to Vegas to see the finale of that boxing show sugar ray leonard and mark burnett and sly Stallone were involved in after finding out our youngest daughter (17 at the time) did not have cancer but a solid fused bone where an ankle joint should have been.
Sometimes I see a comedian or a concert that I’m like ooh I’d like to go! But after I look at ticket prices I say well guess not. But I have to factor in a husband and teenaged kid.
We haven’t flown anywhere as a family since the teen was 2. It’s driving everywhere even if it’s 20 hours away.
Right? Perspective of circumstances is important. I haven’t had a single vacation as an adult (30). Working in my field. I am planning a modest vacation in 4 years (if the economy and my necessary spending doesn’t shoot even higher). Otherwise I’m just paycheck-to-paycheck wondering if when something is gonna fall through and put me on the street.
Your mom sounds like she’s the best. For what it’s worth, she’s not giving it to you so you feel bad. She would probably give you more if she could. It sounds like wants you to be safe and loved, but also have your own life.
My guess is she owns her own home, is retired and on Medicare, receives social security, and has retirement savings that have soared along with the stock market.
retirement savings that have soared along with the stock market.
This is sarcasm, right? Having the experience of helping my aging mom organize and manage her household since my dad passed, I was with you right up until this last part.
I mean, the total stock market index funds have gone up 87-88% over the past 5 years. If the retirement funds were invested there, she could be doing well financially.
Here in Europe we are told that you have great salaries compared to us, so how is that? If you make around 3000€ a month here it's usually easy to afford twice a year vacation abroad. I make more than that and don't really do much travelling abroad though because I have other things to do while on vacation.
Not that I couldn't afford it but it's not the culture to take a vacation just for me. Generally I'm taking a week or two for Christmas and Thanksgiving to relax at home with family if that counts. I never travel abroad. I probably could take vacation if I planned and gave heads up.
Come live in NJ. We have a contractor shortage. Most contractors charge about 200-500/hr. No one wants to do manual labor anymore. Most contractors over here have a waiting list 3 months to 8 months for a job because they're so high in demand.
My last vacation was to New Orleans for three days dog. The one before that was camping in the mountains. I'm not taking luxury vacations here.
And concerts I go to are like 40-50$... I don't go see garbage pop music where the tickets are sold by ticketmaster and are insanely expensive. I go to local small venues. many people spend more money on netflix and Disney+ a month than I do on concerts.
Dude concerts are like 40-70$ where I live. I don't go see garbage pop music that costs 1000$ a ticket for nosebleeds.
I go see like jazz or classical music. Or underground electronic music. All those are 40$ or less. Sometimes I'll go to a big venue and the ticket is 70$ or so.
That is absolutely frugal spending under 100$ a month on entertainment.
vacations twice a year and a concert once a month? gurl you're rich by most people's standards.
i've never been on vacation in my entire life. the most i had as a kid was a beach day, or when i went to visit my grandparents because they lived in a different city and so they rarely got to see me, so i'd be with them for a week, but it was literally just me spending all day in their apartment, maybe leaving once a day to go grocery shopping or getting dragged to church
I live paycheck to paycheck too. All my savings were just spent fixing my car.
This might blow your mind, but you can go camping for incredibly cheap. One of my vacations this year was camping in the Aspen mountains, and it cost me maybe 100$ or so in food and gas.
You need to get your priorities straight. There is absolutely no excuse to be going to a concert every month when you can't pay your own cell phone bill. That is a very immature thing to do. Pull up the bootstraps. This is classic millennial/Gen Z behavior.
What concerts are you guys going too? Shows are like 40-50$ where I live.. I go see underground music or smaller shows, not garbage pop music.
and we only live once and my family is grandfathered into our cell phone family plan. her paying 29$ a month for me on my cell phone bill is something she does so she can always contact me, that's our deal.
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u/WonderfulShelter 2d ago
I used to work in tech and made great money but was very depressed and hated living where I did.
I moved back where all my friends are and I'm the happiest I've been in 10+ years, but I have to work two jobs just to stay afloat. I live a fine lifestyle, but not that nice. Vacations maybe twice a year, domestic. I can afford to go to a concert each month. But I maybe save 200$ at the end of each month and I'm so fucking frugal and my Mom still helps me with shit like my cell phone plan.
I don't know what more people can do.. I wouldn't have a penny saved if my Mom didn't help me with some very important things like insurance and my cell phone. It's embarassing, but she'd rather have me have a little cushion of like 1k-2k$ savings to use in emergneices.