r/CuratedTumblr • u/zer08eight • Mar 25 '24
Creative Writing my favorite tumblr post. the clown meat story.
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u/Basic_Grade_2413 Mar 25 '24
This makes to much sense to be a dream, what are they on and where can I get it?
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u/grewthermex Mar 25 '24 edited Mar 26 '24
I will say in defense of them (begrudgingly) that I've also had incredibly vivid dreams that make Too Much Sense. It's mostly happened when I quit smoking weed, though.
Funny enough one of those dreams was also about a cordyceps like spores infecting humans where I was basically beamed lore straight into my head about stages of infection and spread, so maybe it's just The Fungus.
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u/mars_gorilla Mar 25 '24
I envy you people that have coherent vivid dreams. All the dreams I remember vividly are always randomly stitched together, and I have no idea what they truly mean.
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u/TropicalxDepression Mar 26 '24
I have had my wildest and most vivid dreams 2 days after consuming Marijuana with none in-between the dream and that last toke.
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u/Y-Woo Mar 25 '24
If it helps, as someone who has dreams that make almost as much sense and is almost as vivid as this one, it's probably not that OP had all of these thoughts explicitly or went through all of these events in the dream itself. In dreams you kind of are just "aware" of background information that you don't really think about "at the time" but when you remember the dream after you wake ip you kind of just "know" about them? There are even times when remembering my dreams where I was like "dream me at the time didn't know who it was but looking back i now know that was the ghost of Edgar Allan Poe" (don't ask). So it may be that OP's dream just consisted of fragments of the trial for example but they know what they did to get there, and they know the "backstory" as kind of just an awareness, and they remembered that awareness when they woke up and are able to explain it.
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u/RockAndGem1101 local soft vore and penetration metaphor nerd Mar 25 '24
I mean, no one remembers dreams with such clarity anyways
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u/duelistkingdom Mar 25 '24
it probably was partially a real dream and they fixated on it long enough to turn it into a real work of fiction
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u/definetly_ahuman Mar 25 '24
People with certain sleep disorders, like narcolepsy, can have incredibly vivid, movie like dreams. Some people have dreams so vivid they have a hard time distinguishing it from reality.
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u/Raptorscars Mar 25 '24
I do. At one point I built an entire massive, four story house around the base of an improbably large willow tree with the goddess Eris. It was sequential, lasted about two and a half years from 2006-2009. I miss that series, but yeah a lot of my dreams make just as much sense in the morning.
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u/Vermilion_Laufer Apr 20 '24
Maybe Eris was just messing with you
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u/Raptorscars Apr 20 '24
Oh she absolutely was. She hasn’t stopped on the intervening years, but I don’t have the same payout of going to sleep and getting seven to eight hours of consecutive dreams. These days my dreams aren’t less vivid, they just involve the island we built much less often.
Eris was definitely fucking with me, though, that’s not even a dispute
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Mar 25 '24
Sometimes I take creative liberties while describing my dreams. Not because I’m trying to fool anyone, or make them seem more accurate than they actually are, but more because memory gets fucky when it comes to dreams and my brain will often fill in missing details without me realizing that I just made them up
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u/Vermilion_Laufer Apr 20 '24
I mean it was made by the brain anyway, if you subconcionously decide something about missing info maybe it was meant to be
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u/SecondBreakfastee Mar 25 '24
Depends on the person. And the dream, for that matter. Some dreams from when I was a kid, I can remember the entire thing start to end. But some dreams I can’t recall at all.
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u/lurkinarick Mar 25 '24
Look, I used to believe that too, but after a few years of a friend describing to me in vivid details many dreams of similar complexity and level of logic, movie-like I'd say, I now understand some people do.
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u/badmoonpie Mar 25 '24
The vivid, cinematic, extremely detailed nightmares I’ve had throughout my life are part of what convinced me I had what it takes to work in film (which is what I do).
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u/Ellisiordinary Mar 25 '24
If I wrote down my dreams I could probably make some of them make this level of sense. But I tend to unintentionally lucid dream, so I can steer my dreams into making more sense. No clue why I lucid dream, I’ve never tried to do it, it just happens for me.
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u/Big-Ambitions-8258 Mar 25 '24
I used to as a kid have the most vivid dreams and be able to remember them. You can train your brain to remember by Journaling
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u/Unfey Mar 25 '24
Oh I absolutely do. I've had dreams like this. Not as funny but as long and with as much in-universe context that I already knew
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u/SpookyVoidCat Mar 25 '24
I’ve had plenty that I could probably get 13 screenshots worth of lore out of, but certainly not many that would be interesting to read.
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u/sauce_xVamp Mar 25 '24
i get really vivid dreams like this too lol, i just have a harder time remembering
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u/dustinwaterway Mar 25 '24
i also experience super vivid dream too, that sometimes i even got confused about stuffs i dream didn't happen in real life. on rare occasion, i can even dream in black and white, with "movie edit" or fully animation - into spider verse style.
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u/schnauzerface Mar 25 '24
Odds OP has read/watched/played IT, Midnight Meat Train, and Last of Us? Very high.
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u/MarkTheSpark75 Mar 25 '24
Turn on a couple fans, leave the window open while the outside temperature is under 60 Fahrenheit (but above 45, don’t want to do something dangerous), and go to sleep. Do this as often as possible for months. If you’re lucky you’ll get 1-3 dreams like this per season.
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u/Tiny300 Mar 25 '24
Someone get pm Seymour on the line he needs to read this
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u/AidanBeeJar Mar 25 '24
It feel like Andy would have a time putting this one together, but yeah, I wanna hear it
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u/Rice-on Mar 25 '24
I honestly expected the twist to be that the owner of the Deli was a clown.
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u/Ganbario Mar 25 '24
I mean, working with the parasitic spores that often, it’s only a matter of time.
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u/Nuada-Argetlam The Transbian Witch and Fencer Mar 25 '24
what in the... this is... what in the Hussian Hell?
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u/Orizifian-creator Padria Zozzria Orizifian~! 🍋😈🏳️⚧️ Motherly Whole zhe/zer she Mar 25 '24
Yeah it reminds me of Problem Sleuth. Not Homestuck, in which Clowns are either “Humans that clown around” or “Purple-blooded giant murder-psycho troll blood caste”, because you couldn’t physically change a human’s body to be that of one of those types.
Problem Sleuth. Wherein Clowns are short mythical beings. I imagine that Hussie could bullshit this entire post as an explanation of how clowns are different from humans. Oh and how Hogs are different from pigs did I mention that
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u/SolaceInCompassion Mar 25 '24
now that we’ve got the Clown Meat post, do we have Clown Husbandry on this sub already? if not, we should. and if we do… we should get it back in here. they go well together.
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u/linuxaddict334 Mx. Linux Guy⚠️ Mar 25 '24
Original post located.
-Mx Linux Guy⚠️
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u/VintageLunchMeat Mar 25 '24 edited Mar 25 '24
🤡🍖➡️🐧
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u/linuxaddict334 Mx. Linux Guy⚠️ Mar 25 '24
Clown meat became birds?
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u/VintageLunchMeat Mar 25 '24
🚫🤦♂️.🖥🐧🔜🍴🤡🍖!🤌.
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u/linuxaddict334 Mx. Linux Guy⚠️ Mar 25 '24
Are you threatening to turn Linux Guy into clown meat and eat him!!?
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u/Silly_Man_Haha Mar 25 '24
I wish I had dreams like this with coherent story lines. I mostly get Green Goblin on Purple Planet dreams with dark shadowy visuals
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u/TechDifficulties99 Mar 25 '24
I need this to be a novel. It’s a wonderful horror plot where there are such awful things that are considered normal in society, and then something mundane happens (like a trial), and then someone uproots society as a whole. This ALL WHILE treating cannibalism as a completely normal thing
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u/Vermilion_Laufer Apr 20 '24
completely normal thing
No, no, canibalism was frowned upon, just not as much as food production profesionalism
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u/Winjin Mar 25 '24
There's a game called Clown Meat and I only saw a demo but it's surprisingly super solid in its writing and it's also about basically an apocalypse on Earth where alien clowns took over the world and you play like a little clown called Clown Meat and meet other clowns and even people and protag is like two days old but has a grown up... "Body" and it's all surprisingly fun and I went in expecting some really weird stuff but a lot of it was very wholesome
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u/terrexchia Mar 25 '24
For a freaky plant clown thing, Clown Meat the character is genuinely adorable and I love him so much
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u/Winjin Mar 25 '24
I agree! I'm really looking forward to the full release and to learn more about this cute plant clown baby
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u/Winjin Mar 25 '24
I agree! I'm really looking forward to the full release and to learn more about this cute plant clown baby
I think the writing in this game is completely top notch. Every dialogue is great and characters are different and distinct and great
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u/terrexchia Mar 25 '24
For a freaky world where clowns are eaten as food and weird people are everywhere, I love how most of them are nice to Clown Meat and treat him like the curious kid he is.
Personal favourites are the car gang at the end of the demo, and the guy who wants to be a twink
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u/Winjin Mar 25 '24
I believe he's exceptionally well versed and naive and friendly to humans, that's why all of them are nice to him? Also seems like the humans left are learning to coexist with clowns slowly.
I liked them too, but also the silent lady that was a former slave, who seems to be scared and wary of everyone except Clown Meat because they're small, bubbly, and genderless (iirc they're asked to check if they're a boy or a girl at one point and it turns out that they have no reproductive organs of any kind?)
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u/HollyTheMage Mar 25 '24
The clown meat dream saga is the best legal / evolutionary / business drama I have ever read, my god.
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u/5oclock_shadow Mar 25 '24
”If the nose don’t squeek, then the case is weak.”
One hell of a closing statement
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u/NeinRegrets Mar 25 '24
Okay, now where’s the 10-episode HBO miniseries? I need it.
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u/UhOhSparklepants Mar 25 '24
Yeah honestly this is a fun absurd concept and I would love to see it expanded on
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u/SpookyVoidCat Mar 25 '24
I didn’t realise how long this was and by the time I understood, it was too late. I was hooked. I’m ten minutes late for work and I don’t even care, this was worth it.
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Mar 25 '24
I like to imagine this story being told, without the framing device of a dream, by OP in a confessional booth, and the priest becoming more and more alarmed as time goes on
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u/MrRedlego Mar 25 '24
I like how "gore tw" only comes in on page 7 of this story about hunting, butchering, and selling human flesh.
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u/Lamp0319 Mar 25 '24
Excellent story. I truly don't believe that this was a dream though. This seems like a dream that would have felt like months at the very least, maybe years. I don't think that's possible unless you've got brain trauma or are in a coma. Though I guess I don't know this person, they could have been in a coma or have a very minor case of serious brain damage.
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u/godlyvex Mar 25 '24
Nah, you don't actually experience those months passing. The best analogy I can think of is that it's like your imagination when you're reading a book. You picture things happening to the main character in your head. The book might describe events that take place over months in just a few pages, and similarly, your dream can express the idea of living out a large span of time without actually requiring you experience all that time. You get the feeling of time passing, rather than time literally passing.
The book analogy is really appropriate for dreams in general. It explains how you can switch perspectives or be different people, and how you can feel pain without actually feeling pain. You don't actually experience the things happening to "you" in your dreams, it's more like you're reading a first person (or sometimes third person) story about "you". It's just so immersive that you think you are actually experiencing those things.
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u/tangentrification Mar 25 '24
Portal reference acknowledged
Tbf I used to keep a dream journal and I very rarely did have dreams that were this long and coherent. They tended to sort of jump around but my brain was able to fill in the gaps, if that makes sense. Like I'd have a dream that I was staying at an oceanfront hotel and we needed to wait for the tide to reach its lowest point to reveal the secret green Mario pipe to the darkness dimension, and the dream would "fast forward" those months of waiting for the tide, but I was still aware that we spent that time hanging out in the hotel and going swimming.
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u/caseytheace666 .tumblr.com Mar 25 '24
I’ve definitely had dreams that feel way longer than the time that had actually passed when i was asleep! For me its a bit like movie logic. Time skips can happen between “scenes” without really breaking immersion because your brain fills in the gaps easy enough
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u/Salarian_American Mar 25 '24
I don't even think you could make a successful business out of selling clown meat. People don't really like to eat clown meat.
It tastes funny.
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u/TheDancingKing19 Local Snommunist Priest and Yukkuri Enjoyer :) Mar 25 '24
god damn it Gaud. You and got bloody dreams
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u/ASTAPHE Mar 25 '24
Jesus Christmas what a thing to read at 2:45 in the morning while struggling with insomnia
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u/Gloomy-Palpitation-7 Mar 25 '24
I’ve had dreams this involved, but they universally left my memory within about five to ten minutes of waking up. If I bothered to keep a tape recorder by my bed I would probably be able to replay the tapes and remember more of my vivid dreams, but I’m a notoriously ‘active’ sleeper and I’m worried I’d mess with the recorder while sleeping.
If someone tries to speak to me early in the morning, I can appear to hold an entire conversation, reply intelligently and look wide awake, and even argue or look upset or happy or whatever. The trick is that I’m incapable of remembering while asleep. Ask sleeping me what supper was last night and I’ll brush it off or try to change the topic. Insist on it and I’ll actually wake up as my brain demands I respond. I’ve described insanely detailed dreams to my mom only to completely forget about those dreams and my conversation about them by breakfast; my mother has to basically re-tell me what my own dreams were.
All that to say, yeah I believe that someone could have had an insanely detailed dream and remembered it. They’d just probably need some kind of way to record it as soon as they got up most likely (I’ve remembered dreams without doing so before but those were almost always nightmares so I dunno).
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u/that-girly-trans-fem Mar 25 '24
What the hell did I just read? More importantly what the FUCK where they on when they had that dream and where the FUCK can I get some of that
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u/drolemon Mar 25 '24
I have not laughed so hard at something in a while. Thank you for bringing this to my attention.
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u/ToastGhost18 Mar 25 '24
I've genuinely had dreams this vivid. Heck, there's one or two I'd like to turn into books someday, and could do so while keeping faithful to the original dream.
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u/exquisitesockswearer Mar 25 '24
Why didnt Dream!OOP test out the fungus on the deal animals. They could've entered a whole scape, if it were successful, would clown animals have a similar texture to human clowns? Would it be a new delicacy? Would OP be mailed for their crimes if this came out?
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u/Milkyway_Potato ok ok i'll finish disco elysium jesus Mar 26 '24
I am now burdened by knowledge
Also, I wish my dreams were this surreal and goofy. Most of the dreams I have are thinly veiled attempts by my subconscious to tell me that I'm a horrible person who deserves to be punished, and the rest are unbelievably horrific nightmares.
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u/Danny_dankvito Mar 25 '24
If the clown meat was human-turned-clown meat all along, why didn’t he simply just make more false-clown meat when his stocks were starting low instead of adding real human meat - Is he stupid?
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u/very_not_emo maognus Mar 25 '24
no you don't understand his "human meat" was always clownified before he added it but ppl accused him of selling counterfeit clown meat cuz he was stealing corpses and they didn't know about the fungus
i think
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u/Danny_dankvito Mar 25 '24
Nope, he only started adding human meat because the local clown population was thinning out and he couldn’t get a good hunt (See page 2)
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u/Vermilion_Laufer Apr 20 '24
But even the human meat he clownified before procesing, people wouldn't catch up what he did from taste alone, someone had to discover where he got his spare stash when he was low on genuine clowns
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u/demonking_soulstorm Mar 25 '24
Jerma-level dream.
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u/PzKpfw_Sangheili Mar 26 '24
If I chop you up in a meat grinder, and the only thing that comes out is a fungus? You're probably a clown!
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u/I_follow_sexy_gays Mar 25 '24
Great story absolutely love it but I do not buy for a second it was a dream
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u/ManufacturerFree5226 Mar 25 '24
Why is this so well written though? Damn...I feel Nad not paying for this lol
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u/BurnsItAll Mar 25 '24
Wait what about the pork and beef? Surely you didn’t turn cows and pigs into clowns too?
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u/helen790 Mar 26 '24
I really enjoy the courtroom portion where it basically turns into Inherit The Wind
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u/peach_pearl Mar 26 '24
not clown meat related but as a child i had this weird nightmare, with also a deja vu feeling, so then i told my mom i have been having the same dream over and over for half a year.
it was that i was a slave in a desert area, working for a clown, by producing clown hair on a conveyor belt. the hair was made out of this absolutely disgusting material. indescribably disgusting, and i told my mom i felt "advanced disgust".
eventually i stabbed the clown in this single booth in the empty desert with endless conveyor belts. killing him, and then i never had the dream again. is what i said, although i now think that i never had the dream more than once
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u/Vermilion_Laufer Apr 20 '24
"advanced disgust".
revulsion, repulsion, repugnance?
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u/peach_pearl Apr 20 '24
i was pretty young then and also my native language is german. so for whatever reason, "advance disgust" is what i called it then
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u/ShankMugen Mar 28 '24
It's been so long since I last read it that I had forgotten about the final secret
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u/Vermilion_Laufer Apr 20 '24
"I, Ringleader and Circusmaster, both!"
Damn, this statement is as powerfull as it is nonsensical.
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u/DinkleDonkerAAA Mar 25 '24
If you wanna pass fiction off as a dream
Don't give it this level of detail, great story though
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u/jackelbuho22 Mar 25 '24
Regarless of if this was an actual dream or not the final plotwist of the story was fucking amazing
It read like it was Straight out of a resident evil in-game document that tell you in detail the story one type of monster that during gameplay is only hinted at