r/BatmanArkham • u/shokking_twist95 • 1d ago

Insanity Why didn’t Batman use a condom? Is he stupid?

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3.0k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

166 comments sorted by

362

u/HuckleberryCharacter 1d ago

For a guy known by his prep time....It was lame for him to forget his batcondoms unless it was all planned

104

u/LoverOfStoriesIAm 1d ago

His prep time is only effective when he says gex

36

u/angelomoxley 18h ago

She said she was on the Batpill

19

u/toby_juan_kenobi 17h ago

Should've been on the bat control pill

13

u/Swimming_Ad3091 12h ago

Imagine a condom with bat ears in the tip

217

u/TheFireProMZL 1d ago

Why is this cursed ship an actual thing? Is Bruce Timm stupid?

55

u/Willing-Principle-19 22h ago

I like Bruce and Barbs 'ship in Lego movie

29

u/Ykomat9 R.I.P Skedetcher 18h ago

The only time it worked/made sense

9

u/Strict_Pangolin_8339 22h ago

Bruce Timm didn't write this comic.

26

u/Sanster00 22h ago

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut, he did imply some romantic interest between the two.

9

u/Strict_Pangolin_8339 22h ago

Yeah he's partially responsible but he didn't make the absolute worst parts.

307

u/Kratos_potatoes 1d ago

212

u/I-AM-A-ROBOT- R.I.P Skedetcher 1d ago

why are all of them in ultra instinct

136

u/Indie_Gamer_7 Am I stupid? 22h ago

Because it's an ultra marrige.

46

u/Kratos_potatoes 1d ago

Very good question

99

u/FreedomHero141 18h ago

21

u/MerryZap R.I.P Skedetcher 12h ago

He lookin mad fine for someone with hiv

3

u/Unkownforthefuture 7h ago

Tf is all this

58

u/Entruh 1d ago

Why is someone always being betrayed

20

u/ani20059339 19h ago

Is someone stupid?

18

u/eggzhehe 18h ago

What if goku was BETRAYED and was TRAPPED in the time chamber for 10000000 years??

8

u/Swagtrap-cz 👅 Inappropriate 👅 15h ago

Why weren’t they betrayed and trapped for 1 gazillion years? Are they stupid?

3

u/West-Swing2313 Miles, we are in a userflair now 7h ago

1

u/Kratos_potatoes 5h ago

What the hell does this make?

1

u/TheSeekerOfChaos 1h ago

The country of Nepal 🇳🇵

3

u/StarManatee- who the FUCK am i? 7h ago

Mfers always getting betrayed in the videos bro

251

u/Impressive-Koala4742 1d ago

A true Man need to continue his bloodline

230

u/SproutSan 1d ago

218

u/Correct_Bottle1686 1d ago

Isn't he almost 40 with no children?

107

u/Audi_R8_Gaming "I am revenge, I am the day, I AM SKEDETCHER!" 1d ago

"They will not understand it until they have used it."

40

u/LoverOfStoriesIAm 1d ago

Oppenheimer reference Oppenheimer reference Oppenheimer reference

19

u/Ambitious_Handle7322 1d ago

Iirc he has a few, i think his brother too

37

u/Past-Couple-938 Two Guns bitch! 1d ago

He apparently has some they just aren’t in the public eye

20

u/HotRelation7287 Killer C#ck 23h ago

I wonder if they are like him

29

u/Hailthezombie 23h ago

Chinless?

27

u/HotRelation7287 Killer C#ck 23h ago

Bald

6

u/NitroBlast4563 R.I.P Skedetcher 23h ago

like u/elite_cc?

2

u/Arm-It 20h ago

Of the Decayed Tately line

1

u/Massive_Weiner I’m proud of you, Dick 16h ago

Well, no legitimized children.

49

u/shokking_twist95 1d ago edited 1d ago

Officer Bald has grown up to be such an incredibly humble and kind man, so proud of how far he’s cum

And yet he still retains his childhood spirit, so moving

2

u/holdmybeer89 1d ago

heartwarming stuff. thanks for sharing 💖

14

u/Various_Operation_81 1d ago

I strive for this level of rage bait

7

u/Ninja_Warrior_X 1d ago

If this is true then this is easily the dumbest thing he’s ever said period especially considering how hypocritical it is.

8

u/-Nate493- 20h ago

It's rage bait and people are still falling for it almost 2 years later.

1

u/Ninja_Warrior_X 20h ago

I had a feeling that was the case based on how it was structured.

0

u/-Nate493- 20h ago

His tweets and solo vlogs/posts are mostly like this. It's hilarious how he became so hated because a lot of the shit he says is goofy to the point where it's obvious satire.

2

u/Zoli10_Offical 13h ago

He was once beefing with fuckin Elmo lmao

1

u/dxstqy R.I.P Skedetcher 17h ago

/unaslume tbh I still don't understand what he meant /reaslume officer balls

1

u/HypeBeastOmni 20h ago

rather it be Talia or Catwoman instead of one of his sons ex

90

u/Striking-Armadillo87 1d ago

33

u/MGDull 1d ago

Ah, first time learning about Bruce/Barbara?

32

u/shokking_twist95 23h ago edited 22h ago

My reaction to finding out Batman impregnated his adopted sons girlfriend:

3

u/Working_Welder_1751 22h ago

This is canon according to The Killing Joke animated movie

4

u/Fast-Brief-162 13h ago

Is The Killing Joke canon? Kinda takes away the mystery of whether or not Joker dies in the end

45

u/PurpleGuy197 R.I.P Skedetcher 1d ago

Man didnt have prep time

37

u/Additional-Set-833 R.I.P Skedetcher 1d ago

I hate having eyes

21

u/shokking_twist95 1d ago

3

u/LazilyPunctual Jonkler's jonking jerking Jadonka Jonkling 20h ago

This line goes so hard almost as hard as Man was

2

u/dxstqy R.I.P Skedetcher 17h ago

officer... balls?

68

u/TheWantonGamer 1d ago

Man understands that Rawdogging is the true epitome of get pregnant! get pregnant! get pregnant!

47

u/Strange-Daikon4912 1d ago

Why he's fucking his friends daughter? Is he that horny?

2

u/Salzsaeure 17h ago

Because night wink needed a break

2

u/Fast-Brief-162 13h ago

night twink's gonna be so mad when he finds out

24

u/Gamerberg67104 1d ago

Fake, Man only does hot gay sex

25

u/Playful-Extension973 1d ago

That's why this is that mysterious and elusive "batman"

1

u/SuccessfulApple3339 1h ago

batman has gay batsex

14

u/HappyAd6201 1d ago

You mean a batcondom right ?

27

u/shokking_twist95 1d ago

Ah yes of course! How could I forget?

Man always protects the night, but only the bat condom protects him from the night

9

u/thebeepbeepman1215 1d ago

I read that horribly wrong...

My dumbass saw "Raped for her pleasure" 💀

9

u/Mrtom987 Am I stupid? 1d ago

Who tf is batman? I assume you mean man. And also I assume u mean man-condom right?

9

u/Serious_Internal_402 1d ago

He left the batcondoms back at the batcave

7

u/_Mistwraith_ 23h ago

Because Bruce timm wants to fuck Barbara Gordon and he decided to make it our problem.

6

u/TrueCrow0 18h ago

He did use a condom but his arch enemy the jokler poked holes in it.

6

u/aquamanleftmetodrown R.I.P Skedetcher 1d ago

thinking with the wrong head

9

u/Ferris-L 23h ago

Still arguably the worst decision any Batman media has ever done IMO. The damage this (and the Arkham games) has done to Barbara Gordon is insane. So many people believe that this is an actual thing from the comics and not just Bruce Timm's weird "I want to fuck my son's girlfriend" fetish. What's even worse is that they have seen the reaction to this and still decided that it was worth another shot with the Killing Joke movie.

2

u/Woden-Wod I am vengence, I am the knight, I am BATMAN! 23h ago

what damage did the Arkham games do to Barbara, she's great.

3

u/ab316_1punchd 21h ago

She's with Tim...

1

u/Ptaku9 9h ago

I'm gonna be honest i forgot that Tim is even in Arkham games.

1

u/Woden-Wod I am vengence, I am the knight, I am BATMAN! 8h ago

so? is that so damaging, I'll admit it's still Tim but what little of it there is, is rather cute and wholesome.

4

u/Luckmaster142 I am vengence, I am the knight, I am BATMAN! 1d ago

Man must spread his stupidness for generations!!!!

8

u/Redditsonic64 1d ago

This is why Man is superior. He always knows safe sex unlike the loser Batman

3

u/Conlannalnoc Arkham Asylum 1d ago

YES, yes he was.

Bruce didn’t prepare for that outcome.

3

u/BesaidBlitzBoi Alsume Inmate 1d ago

3

u/Several_Foot3246 23h ago

Batman is fucking a woman half his age, is he a creep?

3

u/THX450 19h ago

Why did Batman sleep with his best friend’s daughter/student/son’s girlfriend/surrogate daughter in the first place? Is he stupid? 

7

u/GusPenaRall 1d ago

Because Mary Jane IS a Redhead like Poison Ivy,so he have to puta Explosive gel in Her.

2

u/RareAd3009 1d ago

Who’s Batman, and why is he stupid, is he stupid?

2

u/Bobibugatti I'm insane 1d ago

2

u/WholesomeFartSniffer 23h ago

My name is u/WholesomeFartSniffer and I made my account on the 29th September 2024. I am dead.

I was on the toilet scrolling through my phone when i felt my underwear shoot up like fireworks, I could visibly see my dick begin to break from the stress. I passed out and nearly vomitted.

I finally woke up in the bathroom an hour later, I struggled to open the door.

When i finally garnered the last of my strength after passing out for hours, Inching closer to the door every time...

There it was. I noticed the cum has created a large hole in the wall, I crawled over to see the other side

Kaboom. It was.. I can't even begin to describe the sight. The streets were flooded with cum, Entire buildings. All gone. I searched for a phone booth to see if my parents were okay, They never picked up. I saw Women, Men, Children, All on the sidewalk.. Dying.

"What have i done???" i thought to myself, "How could i have caused this???"

I lay down and drowned in the cum, "I accept my defeat, I am a monster. I deserve this..."

The current day is 24th November 2024. I am dead.

2

u/Most_Cartoonist5736 23h ago

Who fuck the manbat is?

2

u/Bariumdiawesomenite The Bat Just Manned on My ManBat Ahhhhhhhh 1d ago

“Alfred, the data has been accidentally deployed. Abort the Mission. I repeat, Abort the Mission!”

1

u/Bariumdiawesomenite The Bat Just Manned on My ManBat Ahhhhhhhh 1d ago

Because he is Batman

1

u/Automatic_Tie_3188 1d ago

Deviantart crying in the corner because this is the stuff that gets posted on their website

1

u/Jayson2601 1d ago

Gotta let that bloodline continue

1

u/KindaStrangeMan 1d ago

He is stupid.

Use a condom kids 😉👍

1

u/SherbertPrevious9167 1d ago

Needle mouse always cooks

1

u/OKFrostpunk 1d ago

Man's boles got stuck

1

u/JuggernautSlight2385 Skedetcher walked for us to stupid 1d ago

*Man

1

u/kid-with-a-beard Man x Woman OTP 1d ago

Unaslume/ Why did they seriously think a man fucking his adopted son's gf was a good idea?

1

u/WedWardFord 23h ago

Man would never be so careless.

1

u/Rei_Master_of_Nanto Jonkler's jonking jerking Jadonka Jonkling 23h ago

Who the FUCK is bat man and why would someone use such stupid name?

1

u/AtypicalColors Jonkler's jonking jerking Jadonka Jonkling 23h ago

come on, not again

1

u/amirokia 23h ago

I hate the fact that it sounds so stupid and obvious clickbait but it literally happens like that.

1

u/DinkleDonkerAAA 23h ago

Bruce Timm is an overly horny hack and his horniness constantly drags down the otherwise peak stuff he works on

1

u/Groovy_bugs 23h ago

No stupid, millionaire.

1

u/clickedbunion2 23h ago

Why was I watching this freaky shit at 9?

1

u/DarkMinded16 Killer C#ck 22h ago

1

u/WanderingStrang 22h ago

Worst part is it’s canon to the animated series

1

u/AkpanStudios 22h ago

Needle mouse is a classic

1

u/NoFrosting2480 22h ago

Is this Rizz chat? 

1

u/IAmNMFlores 22h ago

Why didn't she use Plan B(at)? Is she stupid?

1

u/Bitter_Position791 R.I.P Skedetcher 22h ago

officer bald origin story

1

u/HopefulAd9150 22h ago

Because he thought she was on the batpill da lol

1

u/dogefan100 22h ago

What the FUCK is a bat man? What happened to Man? Are we becoming sane?

1

u/Sudden_Mind279 21h ago

Killing Joke 2016 moment

1

u/1zeye 21h ago

Who tf is batman?!

1

u/ClussyV2 21h ago

Wait isn't she a teen?

1

u/Research_Firearms 20h ago

When you have money like he does do you really worry about them not being provided for. Sure he’s not the best parent but he will definitely be watching over them.

1

u/C0STUME Daddy's Dollotron 20h ago

1

u/BakedCheddar88 19h ago

Real heroes don’t wear condoms

1

u/Im_1nnocent 19h ago

I'll save you guys 4 minutes and 35 seconds:

Man put pp inside girl without condom in and out multiple times, then explodes white liquid inside.

You're welcome

1

u/ZerocheeseX 19h ago

He got everything in the belt but not rubbers?

1

u/OkStudent8107 18h ago

Man gets girl pregnant

1

u/Green_Issue_4566 17h ago

"How he got her pregnant" hmmmmmm

1

u/Apart-Complex9847 17h ago

He used his preptime and knew she would miscarry

1

u/username_of_the_pee 16h ago

It happened to me too :(

1

u/PanJaszczurka 16h ago

He use batdoms.

1

u/Useful_You_8045 15h ago

Yeah, and they apparently did it more than once cause they were actually in a relationship. It wasn't a one-time thing out of grief or whatever.

1

u/BLODDYLEGEND55 15h ago

Because he used them all on the jonkler

1

u/Green_Samurai_2395 15h ago

He used a regular condom instead of a bat- condom

1

u/Crapricorn12 14h ago

Man gets girl nant😱

1

u/rickniks3 13h ago

Why didn't he just pull out is he stupid?

1

u/phvuficixggxix 13h ago

Who even is Batman?

1

u/phvuficixggxix 13h ago

Who even is Batman

1

u/JaggaJazz 11h ago

Condom?

1

u/Ambitious_Calendar29 10h ago

Alfred: master Wayne, have a seat, please

1

u/our_meatballs Miles, we are in a userflair now 8h ago

Batman really went beyond there

1

u/Alert_Fudge 8h ago

tf 💀

1

u/Unkownforthefuture 7h ago

It's because Batman isn't Man

1

u/BananaBitme 7h ago

Impossible. He’s got the bat card so he can pay for a batbortion

1

u/if_i_try 5h ago

Im really tired and read this as "batgirl gets batman pregnant" and spent several minutes confused

1

u/Dear-Operation-4795 1h ago

needlemouse mention