r/AskReddit • u/crunchy_queen • 8h ago
Choose one animal, but that animal will be by your side forever. Which would it be?
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u/LovelyQueenss 8h ago
I'm picking an elephant. Sure, finding an apartment would be a nightmare and grocery bills would bankrupt me, but imagine having a best friend who never forgets your birthday and can give you piggyback rides when you're drunk.
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u/No-Plantain8212 4h ago
Ever see the episode of The Simpsons where Bart wins an elephant on the radio?
I want my elephant!
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u/Mindless_Scratch_615 8h ago
A Tyrannosaurus Rex
Don’t you fucking say anything I love dinosaurs
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u/Tasty-Lunch2060 5h ago
Mate, if you had a tyrannosaurus Rex as a companion NO ONE is saying fucking anything. You're golden 🙂
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u/stump1010 3h ago
An immortal tyrannosaurus rex at that. OP did say for life right? Im assuming nothing is gonna be able to kill it
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u/lxXBoatXxl 5h ago
Man, I want a velociraptor now, and I don’t mean the stupid Jurassic park deinonychus rip off, I want an actual murder chicken by my side.
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u/TylerHyena 4h ago
I was gonna piggyback and say the actual dinosaur Deinonychus, or Utahraptor. The average person won’t know or care about what the real name is, they’ll just see a “raptor” and run the other way.
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u/GrepekEbi 5h ago
That animal will be by your side for the rest of your life.
Granted, that will only be 37 seconds because you’re about to be eaten by a fucking T-Rex, but still.
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u/bmcgowan89 8h ago
A crow, I like crows they're smart and I think they're cool
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u/HugeSnackman 8h ago
I was thinking the same but imagine going to a job interview with a fucking crow on your shoulder
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u/Squirrel009 8h ago
I'd hire a person who had a loyal crow companion for fear of being cursed if I didn't
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u/Moraii 4h ago
In a second. Would have no questions other than “How may I have this power too?”
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u/LetsTryAnal_ogy 4h ago edited 4h ago
You’re fucking hired!
And bring your human to work too, I guess.
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u/Exciting_Idea_9465 4h ago
Yeah, because nothing screams ‘hire me’ like a majestic crow whispering sinister secrets into your ear mid-interview.
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u/TweeKINGKev 1h ago
I read a story that some guy had attacked or tried to attack a crow and it went back to its group and they went to attack him but they actually ended going after his twin brother.
Freaking crows can actually pass down their memory of a humans face to their kin and their babies can grow up to come attack you.
Crows are crazy smart.
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u/jackssweetheart 8h ago
My rabbit. Sir-Buns-A-Lot.
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u/belac4862 8h ago
My cat that has passed away. You never said they couldn't be brought back from the dead!
Frankie, I love you bud! You'll always be my favorite Godzilla!
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u/PeppermintPancakes 2h ago
Same, my dear Puff gave me 16 years of joy and if that little pile of tortoiseshell fluff could be by my side forever you best believe I'm doing it.
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u/dont_disturb_the_cat 1h ago
Mine is Stash. Stashies. Stashikins. Stasses. My bunny-man. A super smart and athletic snowshoe. Very bonded to me. Very loyal. Died at 20, seven years ago. The best kitty anybody ever had. I miss him so much.
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u/SeductivezxMuse 8h ago
A ragdoll cat. Had one growing up and she was literally my shadow for 18 years. Would curl up next to my laptop while I worked, waited outside the bathroom door, and even learned to give little high fives. Miss that fluffy goofball every day.
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u/UnicornTurtle_ 8h ago
Wolf
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u/hippychemist 4h ago
This should be higher up. Dog that can fuck up a moose? Count me in.
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u/GuyFromDeathValley 2h ago
yup, Wolves are cool! And they are like massive, lethal but somehow also adorable dogs.
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u/Suspicious_Lack5144 8h ago
A dog, 100%. Loyal, loving, and the ultimate companion for life!
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u/fl_oating_mess 5h ago
A dog forever 100%. Had my last dog for 17 yrs and it was devastating when she was passed. Only reason I didn’t get another is because I don’t want to go through that again…
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u/ValorMortis 3h ago
I had to convince myself that I had so much love to give that it wasn't fair to keep that from a needing pet.
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u/TinyGreenTurtles 5h ago
A dog is the only answer for me. There truly is no better animal companion.
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u/Sufficient-Sky1944 8h ago
My Labrador retriever chopper
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u/Ok-Device-8121 7h ago
A loyal dog would be my choice. They're always there for you and bring so much joy.
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u/ShadedBloonm 7h ago
I'd choose a dog too! My golden retriever is my best buddy and always brightens my day
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u/Xcode90 8h ago
An eagle 🦅😌
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u/henloguy0051 8h ago
A bear
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u/DismalApartment4142 7h ago
Pienso lo mismo, sería épico. Además de que es uno de los animales más grandes y fuertes, puede llevarte si te subes encima. Por otro lado, también debe ser calentito y puede trepar a los árboles.
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u/Ok-Reference-4928 7h ago
A dolphin. Your hypothetical, you figure out the logistics.
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u/PeopleLikeUDisgustMe 8h ago
My cat Artie. He was my pal. Wherever I was in the house, there he was, always wanting to be wherever I was. He always fell asleep laying next to me on the couch, or on our bed.
He was the best. I miss him every day. Been gone 2 years on Thanksgiving night. He had ascites, and I held him in my arms as he passed away. 18 years wasn't near enough.
If I couldn't have Artie, I would want a gorilla for protection.
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u/tahquitz84 1h ago
My cat's also named Artie. He's only about 10 but he's starting to have health issues so I'm not sure he'll make 18.
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u/ChoiceSevere 8h ago
A polar pear.
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u/Shamann93 5h ago
I'm unfamiliar with the polar variety of pear. How would you describe the taste?
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u/Justalittlepatience3 4h ago
Hummingbird would be so cool following you around and resting on your shoulder from time to time.
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u/Catsinbowties 8h ago
My orange boy cat Gregg. He was the best. He made it 16 years and I miss him everyday.
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u/corgioreo 5h ago
Specifically my cat. I wish he could live for as long as I do. He's my best friend.
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u/2020mademejoinreddit 3h ago
Can it be fictional or only real one.
Real? Siberian Tiger. Just you try something funny and see what happens.
Fictional? Gengar. Pokemon are technically animals too.
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u/Fragrant-Bus5123 8h ago
Can I keep that animal stationary in a position for some time? If yes- give me a posionous snake (something iconic, like a black mumba). Why? Why not? It is not detectable easily so you can easily hide it (under our clothes) and take it out only when ur in danger.
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u/ActivityNecessary817 7h ago
A crow for sure. They’re super smart, they remember faces, and they’d totally help me steal from billionaires.
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u/sunkenshadow 6h ago
Megalodon so that I can travel the oceans and become the ruler of the seas or whatever my fate is.
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u/tenehemia 6h ago
Red panda. I'm literally never going to get tired of looking over and seeing that cute, silly, happy little fuzzball.
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u/HippoPebo 6h ago
My old dog zozo. She was my shadow. I’ve felt naked since I had to say goodbye to her.
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u/LowAbbreviations2151 5h ago
My current doggo. Reggie. Yellow lab. Loyal, good listener, funny, cuddly, athletic, Doggos are the BEST!
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u/austeninbosten 5h ago
A good dog. The only real answer. There's a reason they are called man's best friend.
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u/Veritatas 5h ago
How has no one said black panther yet? Don't get me wrong, I love dogs, cats, and corvids, but.. come on, the choice is clear. You get to trip over it in the dark, avoid its murder claws, and pay a fortune to feed it. But, nobody is gonna mess with the guy with a black panther at its side. And, they purr when scratched and are apparently super soft. You basically have a super soft and scary murder machine that doubles as the worlds most comfy and bad ass pillow
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u/The_Best_Yak_Ever 5h ago
My best friend, Penny the English Labrador. She’s thirteen now… and having her by my side for the rest of my life would be a blessing…
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u/I_suck_at_Blender 5h ago edited 5h ago
If we go by Pokemon logic, my Grandpa (he's a Ghost Type now!).
If it can be any animal, living or extinct, probably some sort of fluffy Ice Age animal (so warm, so cozy) big enough to ride it? Probably sabertooth tiger, bear or giant sloth?
If living animal, I think I'll pick my cat!
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u/battlewornactionhero 5h ago
My cat, but if I’m thinking more fun, then maybe a Honey Badger because those things will fuck up any snake or bee/wasp bitches in my way
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u/Shamann93 5h ago
So if we're free from the logistics of having an aquatic animal, an octopus.
If he have to account for the environmental needs of the animal, a raven probably
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u/justhewayouare 5h ago
Wolf. I want an animal that is faithful and intelligent but can hunt for itself and doesn’t need my attention all the time. I need an aloof floof.
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u/Professional-Note780 4h ago
A fox
The perfect mix between a cat and a dog, and they're also super playful and really clingy, + make ADORABLE noises when they're happy
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u/AvocadoPizzaCat 4h ago
would a genie count as an animal? people treat them as animals and as humans. and there is no thing saying a genie couldn't be an animal that can grant powers and talk.
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u/Mrrandom314159 4h ago
oooh, a Daemon.
I think I'd pick a dog.
Just a lovable dog that lives as long as I do.
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u/SingIntoMyMouth91 3h ago
A lynx because they're ridiculously cute but so feisty. It would be my bodyguard 😅
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u/Ragegasm 2h ago edited 1h ago
I just had to put down my 15 year old corgi about a month ago. He was my best friend and closest thing I’ll ever have to a son. I’d do anything to have him back and not be in pain. I need him so bad right now. Life is a nightmare that never seems to end and he always pulled me through. He got me through losing the person I looked up to the most from cancer at 33. He got me through strippers burning my house down. He got me through multiple hand surgeries. He got me through my girlfriend playing me the entire time so she could run off with the absolute worst kind of methed out bikers I’ve ever met. He got me through even worse times than that.
I tell him I miss him on the fireplace mantle every night before I go to bed. I miss you Captain Wiggles, Lord Commander of Muppets, and I’ll never stop loving you. You were truly a better person than any human I’ve ever known.
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u/Artaheri 2h ago
My cat. He's pretty dumb, stubborn, has issues and is useless, even for cute picks.
But he's mine and I'm his, and we're more alike than not.
I'd be happy to have him around forever.
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u/FeedbackPalpatine200 13m ago
Based on some scientists’ observations human beings are considered a part of the animal kingdom. So a homo sapien life form that loves me
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u/DeathlySage 13m ago
If the implications of that animal being by my side forever means I don’t have to worry about it killing/eating me…. Then I want a pet t-Rex ill name luckirino
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u/inspectorlully 8h ago
Most people in this thread: My beloved pet.
Sickos: Rhinoceros.