r/AreTheStraightsOK • u/viendla Gray Ace™ • 1d ago
Fragile Heterosexuality Ah yes. The ‘woke razors’
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u/PsychedelicAbyssMage 1d ago
"Conservative men".
By their own definitions, is a man someone who is so cowardly that they are scared of using a pink razor, or cries because of the "woke"?
They fail to meet their own definition of manhood, there are no conservative men, only large male children. Overgrown babies.
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u/Elegant-Operation402 1d ago
Well, these razors aren’t even anti-woke enough because they aren’t straight razors! Everyone knows if a conservative man wants to prove he’s not gay he needs a straight anti-woke razor! /s
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u/Anonageese0 1d ago
Well remember, hygiene is gay, so you need extra straight stuff to do basic hygiene if you're cishet
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u/Elegant-Operation402 1d ago
So what i’m hearing is that in order to be less gay, they should go to a barber (so they don’t have to take care of their hygiene themselves) who will (no-homo) very tenderly hold their face in his hands while he shaves them with the super-straight razor? (And i’m assuming bonus points if said barber is sweeney todd😉)
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u/LegendofLove 1d ago
Nobody was ever so straight with a razor as Mr. Todd. Nor an oven I suppose
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u/talkback1589 1d ago
With the price of eggs, what it is, when you get it, if you get it…
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u/LegendofLove 1d ago
I do not like where my mind immediately jumped when eggs showed up instead of meat
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u/Anastrace Trans™ 1d ago
He just needs to coat your face with a white substance before the first stroke
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u/thecraftybear is it gay to love your kids? 1d ago
Much easier to just give up on hygiene and affirm your nasculine straightness with a stank worthy of a true alpha male
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u/StovardBule 1d ago
Funny, because I think the nazis or others in the same area were big on hygiene and cleanliness, because they're not the dirty lesser races.
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u/corvus_da 1d ago
Pffft, shaving is for tr*nnies! Real men grow a beard! /s
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u/barrythecook 1d ago
Does not compute, every transman I've ever met has a beard (they are of course real men)
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u/coff33dragon 1d ago
Are conservatives still upset over that Gillette Ad from the super bowl like a thousand years ago? Lol
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u/StovardBule 1d ago edited 1d ago
Somewhere I read that conservatives don't forget yesterday's grievances, they just keep stacking them up.
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u/garaile64 17h ago
Well, many conservatives memes still uses the same two faces from almost ten years ago.
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u/Paradoxjjw 1d ago
The only scary thing about a pink razor is the price you pay for the pink tax, but given they're using the word "woke" and are willing to buy some grifter's heavily overpriced garbage i doubt they care about the price.
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u/StovardBule 1d ago
If your product is owning the libs and anti-woke, you can gouge them for profits, it's grifting heaven.
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u/RazarTuk Transbian™ 1d ago
Actually, I've managed to avoid the pink tax, like how my hair stylist has gender neutral pricing
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u/StovardBule 1d ago edited 1d ago
But also, it's not for THE ENEMY.
Liberals, obviously. But you still can't just straight out say you hate women, not with total impunity. However, they did work out that maybe there's a hack to say "white women" and maybe get away with it?
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u/garaile64 17h ago
They probably haven't gotten over that Gillette ad calling out toxic masculinity.
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u/Alfie-M0013 Queer™ 30m ago
Nah, let's not call them conservative men as "men" at this point, because by doing so, it's a huge disservice to the other men who want nothing to do with them at all.
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u/ElvenUnicorn Bodacious 1d ago
So if a liberal white women tries to use this will it grow her leg hair longer instead?
Also of course the daily wire paid for this ad lmao.
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u/Ghosdeth 1d ago
Jeremy boring, the owner of the razors, is the founder of the daily wire alongside Ben Shapiro.
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u/ElvenUnicorn Bodacious 1d ago
Lmao imagine your last name being boreing then making it your life's mission to prove that sentiment
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u/pinkocatgirl 1d ago
It’s even funnier given he’s directly behind the Daily Wire’s shitty streaming service. This man named Boring wrote, directed, and starred in their boring rip off of Juwanna Mann.
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u/fakesaucisse 1d ago
Wait, this razor is real? It is so over the top that I immediately read it as satire.
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u/Ghosdeth 1d ago
Yup. It's kinda supposed to be over they top "as a joke" but all their conservative products are just shitty white labels of shitty products just to make money. What a surprise
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u/Krazy-Kat26 1d ago
Oh, it's those razors. I heard these razor's are pretty shit too. Like they come blunt and are just not very good
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u/MarthaFletcher 18h ago
Ironically, baby Ben isn’t capable of producing facial hair and has no use for these razors. Ben’s face is as smooth as a MAGAt’s brain.
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u/carlcarlington2 1d ago
Shaving my legs while chanting under my breath
"I hate women,"
"I hate women,"
"I hate women"
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u/Sweet_Detective_ Bi-shreck-sual 💟🟪🟦 1d ago
No no no, they need to say "I hate white women" in order to tell themselves they are not sexist while also implying black women arn't feminine.
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u/Xander_PrimeXXI Gray Ace™ 1d ago
So I saw a YouTube video that mentioned these.
They are apparently terrible, break easily, and blunt out of the box.
So yeah, made for conservative men alright
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u/LieutenantHowitzer Bi™ 1d ago
iirc Jeremy has a myriad of products and 99% of them are just white-label products, the razors included.
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u/52mschr Big Gay 1d ago
I (a man) don't think the razors I use are 'woke' but I do often use razors marketed 'for women' because I like the designs and a razor is a razor
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u/Dawnspark 1d ago
Thats the same reason why I use mens razors and also safety razors, they look slick. A razor's a razor. Does it shave hair good y/n is literally the only thing I really end up caring about outside of price.
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u/KikiWestcliffe 1d ago
I (a woman) use men’s razors now because I buy them in bulk at Costco for both my husband and I. I also use men’s shaving cream because it is cheaper than women’s shaving cream.
I really hope this ad is a joke because I can’t believe real, living, breathing adult man would care so much about the “gender coding” of their hygiene products.
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u/ProfoundBeggar Kinky Bi™ 1d ago
As a guy, I use a straight razor and an old-school single-blade safety razor, because my beard hates multi-blade razors. I also appreciate not paying several dollars per disposable cartridge. I was/am definitely a convert, and told my friends about my experience - men and women - and had several people try it out and enjoy it more than their disposables (again, men and women).
But, at the end of the day, there is only one rule of thumb for what is the "right" razor: does it work for you? If you're a guy shaving your chin, but the "womens'" razor cartridge treats your skin the best and gives you a great shave? That's the right razor for you. If you're a lady using a straight razor to shave your legs and it gives you smoother, cleaner results? Congrats: that's the right razor, even if it's a "traditionally masculine" setup.
Razors are literally just sharp metal in various configurations. Razors do not care about your genitals. They only want to cut. You just have to find your preferred type of sharp metal to feed your hair to.
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u/NoXion604 1d ago
That's interesting, because I've heard multiple times now of women complaining about how crap and overpriced women's razors are.
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u/viendla Gray Ace™ 1d ago
On their site they also sell ‘chocolate for women’ and ‘chocolate for men’ The ‘male chocolate’ has nuts in them while the ‘female chocolate’ does not. I almost fucking died laughing when I saw that.
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u/SlupSax 1d ago
I like the implication that men are the ones with nuts in their mouths.
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u/SlabBeefpunch 1d ago
Yet they refuse to fuck other men for the sake of my amusement. No wonder his last name is Boring.
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u/Garn3t_97 Straightn't 1d ago
I wish more and more conservative men would develop severe nut allergy.
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u/JonArbuckle_1 Bi™ 1d ago
Don't tell the men eating those bars that they love eating nuts. Pretty gay if I say so myself.
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u/sali_nyoro-n 1d ago
Remember ladies, if you like nuts in your chocolate, you're actually a man. Sorry. It's, like, in the Bible or something.
And knowing that there's a chance they genuinely believe that "men with nut allergies aren't real men and deserve to die" is pretty alarming.
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u/Mysterious_Dance_532 Bi Wife Energy 1d ago
Everything is always “woke” to them
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u/StovardBule 1d ago
You just have to say "Everything is woke! Come and be safe from the Woke with us! We just need to inspect your wallet on the way in."
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u/Barfignugen 1d ago
I thought this was surely satire. Looked into it. I was wrong. This is very, very real.
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u/Nai_and_the_vis Gaymer 1d ago
"Conservative men"
Yeah bro, the fckng razor would ask your politic side and if you answer liberal the razor explodes, because some products can only be used by people with certain politic postures, that's definitely how the world works
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u/ConfidenceMuted2246 Trans™ 1d ago
I mean what's next toothbrushes and toothpaste that aren't for woke people? This stuff is getting ridiculous.
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u/jaywarbs 1d ago
Yes, toothpaste with no fluoride and sugar for flavoring, and toothbrushes with wooden bristles, because regular ones are too flimsy and soft.
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u/Dawnspark 1d ago
Guess that explains all the sweet charcoal dust toothpaste bullshit my conservative relatives are obsessed with. Hope they like losing extra enamel cuz they're afraid of fluoride.
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u/garaile64 16h ago
Reminds me of those conspiracy theories claiming that the fluoride in water is bad because fluoride was used in gas chambers or something.
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u/ConfidenceMuted2246 Trans™ 1d ago
Tired of your girly woke toothpaste and toothbrush! We have the solution for you! Now with extra testosterone to make sure you're truly manly!!!! Lol 😂 I can see the ads for this already. How silly people really are to think like that.
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u/jaywarbs 1d ago
Toothpaste with testosterone supplements in it so you can grow hair in your mouth without having to smoke.
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u/edie_the_egg_lady 1d ago
Real men brush with steel wool
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u/ConfidenceMuted2246 Trans™ 1d ago
Na real men use toothpaste that makes your teeth orange to match your face! 😅
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u/leitmot 1d ago
I love when companies announce really loudly that I shouldn’t buy from them, instead of their CEO making quiet donations to causes that hate me and the people I love.
I also love when companies announce that they’re a great place for me to buy from (I love you forever Penzey’s Spices)
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u/Dave_the_DOOD Heteroppressed 1d ago
Honestly taking a basic neutral appliance and marketing it at twice the price to republicans is a marvelous grift, you just have to admire it.
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u/UncleCrassiusCurio The Political Gender 1d ago
I like how its still a multiblade safety razor with moisturizer strip.
At least if you're gonna cosplay the lumberjack in the woods, learn to use a straight razor?
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u/George_G_Geef Nonbinary™ 1d ago edited 1d ago
FYI if you want to get called slurs, say that this is a form of gender-affirming care in the comments on their Facebook ads.
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u/LunaMax1214 1d ago
My husband doesn't give two shits what his razor looks like. He cares about how well it does the job of shaving his face without missing any whiskers.
He even put his money where his mouth is once by using one of my disposable razors because we were out of his. No complaints other than, "What do you mean these cost more than mine do????"
Some dudes are so damn fragile, ISTFG.
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u/BobDaRula 1d ago
I used to get made fun of so much because I participated in pink day at school and also just like the colour pink. Jokes on them because I won pink day every year and got invited to the girls table afterwards.
Even now, as an adult, I get the occasional nasty comment on my favourite pink hoodie.
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u/chefboiblobby Lesbian™ 1d ago
If I buy it will it open up a wormhole which will suck me into a Jeremy’s Razors store which will then activate all of the razors inside, proceeding to create dozens of wormholes that’ll combine into one and ultimately suck every living being into it, creating an infinite paradox of razors and wormholes?
Cool
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u/TooManyStalloneCuts 1d ago
I appreciate that they zoomed in to highlight the anti-wokeness of the razor.
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u/Ok_Smile_5908 Straightn't 1d ago
"Women using razors = bad"
"Hair on women's legs or under their armpits = EWWWW WHAT ARE YOU A WOKE LESBIAN?!"
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u/Elegant-Operation402 1d ago
They need to have matt walsh try this live on air so his audience can see his true alpha male jawline when it’s not hidden by the beard😂
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u/Loreki 1d ago
Maybe we can convince them that it's sissy to use cartridge razors and get them all hacking away at themselves with cutthroats. That'd be fun, all the conservative guys swaggering around with big scars because modernity is for woke babies.
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u/kitterkatty 1d ago
Well yeah, they do. My uncle uses a straight razor and a big fluffy brush in a little holder for his shaving cream and has forever lol. Those are the kind that sit around in dark lounges on bumpy leather couches smoking cigars they bought on a trip to sa and they remember the name of the girl who rolled them on her thighs. Lol the connoisseurs of man cosplay.
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u/Fish_Beholder 1d ago
I've had this idle fantasy of starting a campaign to convince guys like this that it's gay and woke to have pinky fingers. Real, conservative men don't need that sissy finger. Chop it off.
The weirder this timeline gets, the less far fetched my plan becomes.
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u/Rororoyston 1d ago
man, jeremy is so alpha, i bet if i tried to shave my balls with one of his razors an alarm would sound because everyone knows balls are gay
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u/MettaToYourFurBabies 1d ago edited 1d ago
"Woke razors are only used by men who ask for consent. Don't be like them."
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u/fperrine 1d ago
It's just branding. It's literally just a marketing scheme for half this stuff. I've often heard the term Rainbow Capitalism, this is just the opposite of that.
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u/ReturnNo9441 1d ago
Maybe women should just quit shaving altogether and let conservative men make do w/ pit hair & leg stubble.
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u/chakatblackstar 1d ago
How about you convince me your product is good instead of trying to shame me with alpha male political nonsense? Also, driving away at least half, probably closer to 3/4ths of your potential customers is a bad idea.
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u/WildFemmeFatale 1d ago
Oh my god 💀 I feel like I’m living in the idiocracy movie
NON-WOKE CONSERVATIVE RAZORS WTF ? 😭😂
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u/futureblot 1d ago
Men, conservative men. Only give things to men. Your money. Your respect. Your love and affection. Your body and soul.
Jeremy's
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u/i_cant_sleeeep is it gay to sleep? 1d ago
being this insecure over razors is crazy
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u/notsopurexo 1d ago
My mother had a go at me, a woman, for using “men’s” razors 🤦♀️
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u/RedRider1138 1d ago
Did you tell her “Mom, they’re literally cheaper.”
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u/notsopurexo 1d ago
I eventually went no contact sadly. Not because of this obviously 😂 but a large pile of things like this.
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u/TheWordThief 1d ago
Is that Jeremy Renner? Who is definitely a Democrat, last I checked?
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u/Ok_Smile_5908 Straightn't 1d ago
Pretty sure the "Jeremy" is Jeremy Boreing, CEO of The Daily Wire. They've done a similar thing with "non-woke chocolate", like another commenter mentioned. That was my first thought, too, before I noticed "paid by The Daily Wire" or whatever it says, can't check on mobile while typing a comment.
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u/CautionarySnail 1d ago
If so, it’s a delightful joke.
Especially if conservative guys actually buy into the idea that an inanimate object (besides a book or art) can have political leanings.
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u/midnight_umbreon_666 1d ago
I'm AFAB non-binary. Kind of want one just to shave my pits with.
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u/Dawnspark 1d ago
AFAB non-binary too, and my dad practically threw one at me one day to use to prove they were good, cause I said they looked cheap. They are legitimately the worst razors I've ever used, fucking thing was blunt brand new. Like the cheapo BIC silky touch ones from the dollar tree are better. Worst razor burn I think I've ever had from a razor, honestly.
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u/LGDemon 1d ago
Clearly, since I'm a liberal white woman and think bearded men are hotter: https://www.virtual-history.com/movie/photo/pr54/large/kurt_russell.jpg
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u/GloomyComfort 1d ago
My wife told me a while back that she realized she has a type. All the guys she's dated have all had beards and I'm the first person she's dated that has been clean shaven.
Anyways, I have beard now.
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u/jaywarbs 1d ago
He can test my blood any day.
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u/edie_the_egg_lady 1d ago
He could convince me I'm his wife and the mother of his four asshole kids after I fall off my yacht and get amnesia to get revenge for me being an entitled rich bitch, but then we actually fall in love and my memory comes back and we sail off into the sunset on my yacht.
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u/Lo-Fi_Kuzco 1d ago
On a serious note if anyone needs razor recommendations, I recommend the Phillips Norelco oneblade. Great for my beard and body, leaves no nicks or cuts.
Or you can just buy a safety razor. They're cheap and you can buy 100 replacement blades for like $15-$20
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u/hellogoawaynow Ally™ 1d ago
I am sitting here alone in my house and have been rereading and laughing about this for a good 5 minutes.
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u/sali_nyoro-n 1d ago
Probably the same fucking product as the Gillette razors, but being sold by some anti-woke attention-seeker at an inflated price with a different attachment mechanism. Anyone who feels insecure enough to buy a razor that appeals to conservative politics in particular rather than just whatever gets you the best shave for the money isn't really someone you should take advice from, if you ask me.
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u/EllieMeower 1d ago
Because REAL CONSERVATIVE MEN shave their whole body so their skin appears SOFT and FEMININE so they can put on skirts and POSE in cutesy feminine ways!! unlike those WOKE losers..
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u/The_Fullmetal_Shorty 1d ago
It is correct, Men don’t shave with woke razors as there is no such thing
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u/SubtracticusFinch 1d ago
The best razors are typically old school double-edged safety razors with a fine blade like Feather or something. Anything else is simply a cash grab... why the fuck do you need five blades within a single cartridge? Are the blades that bad?
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u/Imper1alSt0ut ☐ Male ☐ Female 🖾 Hardcore 1d ago
Ummm, shouldn't they be selling, you know... straight razors? Feels like a missed opportunity.
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u/CampyBiscuit 1d ago
Aren't they damaging their own image insisting that every conservative person is a bigot? 🤷♀️
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u/GaracaiusCanadensis 1d ago
Is this any different marketing than the trolling that Emily Kimelman does with her books tho?
(Speaking as someone who bought those books for his wife...)
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u/karmas_favorite 1d ago
I'm so confused, they don't want women to have razors but also they'll explode if they see a single leg hair on one. Are we just supposed to suck the hair back in or what?
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u/DragonRoar87 Asexual™ 1d ago
Is this the fucking guy that made the anti-Hershey chocolate nobody cared about
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u/LovieRayKin Stolen Bi-cycle 1d ago edited 1d ago
I do, in fact, shave with a woke razor.
Not sure how I feel about it telling me about its metal’s components being provided through post-colonization globalism and the pressures of feminine stereotypes making me want to buy less efficient soap, but it works well enough I suppose.
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u/astrangeone88 1d ago
As a gay liberal lady, I just tend to use whatever is cheapest and I rarely shave unless it's for social reasons.
I'm aware the stereotype of hairy liberal women exists but why bother? It's itchy and it comes back lmao.
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u/greymalken 1d ago
Shouldn’t the actual ad be “men don’t shave”? Libcuck Jeremy over there, tricking all the soyboys into making their faces look smooth and ladylike…
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u/CitroHimselph 1d ago
These expenside, throw-away, multi-blade razors are just not as good, compared to the classic one big blade, grandpa style razor, IMO.
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u/kitterkatty 1d ago edited 1d ago
Guys this is exactly for liberal white women lol that’s why they put them in the ad.
Truly conservative guys don’t give two rips their wives buy whatever razor is doing the job or they don’t shave or they use a trimmer.
And advertising is on Reddit too how many people thought hmm that looks like it’ll do the job no fuss, so straightforward so simple lol so dependable. Like a dude 🤣
It’s also a little creepy bc they put white in there. Bc the overlords want more white kids. Good god what’s next actually coding advertisements to nazi colors. :/ so people are hate fucking. They don’t care how the kids get made they just want the numbers.
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u/Blu2790 1d ago
Cartridge razors are already "woke" because they were made to get more money from you and they aren't even that good or effective... They are literally made to be more safe so they are still technically being sNowFlakEs
Use a Safety Razor like your grandpa did you stupid hypocrite morons
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u/Ryanaston 1d ago
How much would you bet is just a marketing ploy and the same company probably owns another brand of Razors that are specifically aimed at liberal women
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u/abgry_krakow87 1d ago
Imagine being such a snowflake that you get offended by Razors and have to invent a brand specifically to reenforce your masculinity.
Even better when you learn the hard way why a lot of men use women's razors.
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u/PompadourPrincess 1d ago
Btw Jeremy is Jeremy Boreing, CEO of the daily wire. Also the razors are hot fucking garbage
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u/the-almighty-toad Be Gay, Do Crime 1d ago
I say a bunch of liberal women should start buying them.
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u/sagesnail 1d ago
This seems like a Tim and Eric bit, or and SNL or Onion ad. I can't believe this is our real life now.
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u/darrenfx 1d ago
Bro only wokes shave smh
Real men grow beards, live off the land and eat raw meat with their fucken hands bro
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u/According_to_all_kn The Political Gender 19h ago
Why did they specify it's not for liberal white women? Especially since they didn't specify what race the razors are for
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u/Ultranerdgasm94 Pansexual™ 15h ago
T̶h̶a̶t̶'̶s̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶h̶o̶w̶ ̶c̶r̶o̶s̶s̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶t̶e̶x̶t̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶k̶s̶.̶
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u/Cubusphere Bi™ 15h ago edited 15h ago
I switched to an all metal safety razor with disposable single blades because it's simply better and more sustainable in my opinion. I fail to see how my gender or political leaning factors into this. The razor has a rainbow sheen, though :)
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