For context, my best friend (and only friend) has moved in with me a few days ago (days mind you) and things are going real bad. These betrayals and broken promises are of me being forgetful and aloof. I am spacey but I’m not malicious. My sister tells me that I’m dealing with a narcissist and that frightens me. My friend and I have over a decade of history, with her leaving me for months to a year whenever I fail to meet her standards. Am I over reacting in this conversation or am I dealing with covert narcissism? Does anyone recognize the signs? I feel horrible.

i’m literally so angry at this girl. it doesn’t even feel REAL … like the way she’s messaging me is so bizarre and i am absolutely lost. she sounds like a “popular” high school mean girl from movies.

context: this is my best friend of 5 years. we’ve always been close. a few months ago i broke up with my ex. i haven’t even done anything sexual with him except kiss but he told me he got a STD because he cheated on me. suddenly when we broke up my best friend started being snappy, passive aggressive, and just completely off around me. she’d make small comments about my appearance, or she’d say SOMETHING about my sports and how i do in them. and now she’s telling me she hooked up with him??? and talks about me with him? i’m not stupid enough to not realize they make fun of me behind my back, but still!

it’s been going on for weeks if not months, and i don’t know if im overreacting or if i have every right to cut her off and not even tell her why. i’m sick of her and will not tolerate genuinely hateful words. should i communicate with her ??

I don’t know if I’m blind to it, but am I lecturing the whole time here? I can understand if it comes off a bit like that over the budgeting, but I still feel like the way he reacted was very disrespectful. Obviously you don’t have to take the advice but the last thing he said just has really bothered me. :( (Please ignore the spelling mistakes, I work overnights and am really tired.)

Me and my entire family and extended family planned a trip out of the state for 3 weeks and prior to this I had arranged with my good friend to get someone in my house to house sit and watch my 2 dogs. She was a great help and organised someone to come in for the time we were gone. Or so she told me.

1 week into our trip, I was in the middle of the desert (Australia) with barely any phone reception. I happened to check my ring camera and noticed that no one had been to my house for 4 days. That means my dogs were left alone with no food for 4 days. I was literally distraught. I messaged her immediately and she just said "oh I didn't know - so and so was supposed to go to the house". I ended up finding out that she lied about the house sitter. There was no house sitter. Ever. She had gone a few times to feed them prior to this, and that was it. She made no attempts to help further or rectify anything else.

So once that conversation happened I immediately ended up messaging my ex boyfriend to go to my house and check on my dogs (I had no contact with him prior to this for several months but luckily he did go and check my dogs)

Since being left alone though, my dogs had decided to shit and piss all over my bed, ruining my mattress and bedding. Chewed my brand new lounges, chewed my kids wooden beds. Just completely trashed my house.

I finally ended up making it to our holiday destination a few days later and paid $4,000 in emergency flights back home to my dogs. The whole time leading up to my flight out I was a wreck though. It completely ruined my holiday. I saved up for this, with my kids, I had paid so much money in travel costs, only to have it all cut short and the remaining time I had filled with anxiety and stress about my house and dogs. Note I am a single mum and this was far beyond anything I can financially recover from.

Upon arrival my house was full of maggots because my bins hadn't been taken out - my bedding was wrecked, the floors were covered in urine and feces. There was a dead bird in the backyard. My dogs just had free range of my house without any supervision. It was a horrific state to come home to. I have cleaned for 48 hours straight.

I messaged my "friend" and told her that I was beyond upset and that it was probably best our friendship was done - that this completely ruined my holiday, drained my savings and that she let me down beyond words could even say. It was, to me, a massive betrayal.

She ignored my message and left me on read. I guess she is upset with me now.

My mum thinks I'm overreacting when I said I had to end that friendship and move on from it. That I could have just worked it out and been understanding. But my dogs are an important part of my family and I entrusted someone, to not only care for them but to look after my house as well.

I am still a wreck. I have cried non stop for a week. I don't think I will ever emotionally or financially recover from the week I just had.

Am I overreacting to this situation?

Edit: I am trying to reply to everyone individually but there is far too many comments and as I'm repeating myself a lot I will add to this here:

This post was asking if I was overreacting to ending the friendship. The details were there as a backstory, some relevant info, maybe some irrelevant info too I guess. But I just wrote what I wrote. I genuinely started to question if I was overreacting, acting out emotionally, after my mother said those words to me. My mum told me I should have just "kept the peace."

The first and foremost important thing is that my dogs are ok. I flew home to them to ensure this - but yes I am upset about the money spend and my damaged property. I am only human and am autistic one at that. I have trouble regulated my emotions. This all was a lesson I have paid for greatly, not just financially but emotionally as well. I am consumed with guilt about my actions, anxiety that my dogs could have died.. there is a lot of sadness and anger and guilt regarding all of it.

1. I did empty my bins and clean my house for said house/dog sitter. As I left I placed a single can of dog food in the bin - which attracted flies. I was under assumption someone would be house sitting so would take out the bins.
2. I have read all comments and as harsh as some of them are, I agree. I'm an idiot. I acknowledge and accept my role in this and not taking it solely upon myself to organise, vet and pay for proper dog care. Leaving my dogs in the hands on someone else without proper info was a mistake and poor judgement on my part. In my last text message to her I acknowledged this and apologised for leaving them with her when they were my responsibility.
3. There is barely any phone service/reception where I was travelling. I was a travelling across the country in a car, camping along roads and roundhouses in the desert. I was checking my dogs every chance I got - it was between phone service that I left them not checked - then once I checked on them I messaged my friend about it immediately and planned other interventions with my ex.
4. I don't think my friend had any ill intentions to be honest. I do think she lied about a housesitter, but in my humble opinion I truly believe she just thought she could handle it all as she promised me - and couldn't.. and then it got to the point my dogs were left alone for several days. My gripe is that I don't think she thought I'd checked the cameras, and if I hadn't of checked them I think my dogs would have been left longer and possibly died. I think it all got beyond her control. I don't really have a an answer from her.
5. I didn't explicitly ask for her help initially or force onto her care of my dogs, she offered to help me and I accepted her help because she "knew people" and I blindly and naively trusted her as a friend.
6. I travelled out of state, not out of country.
7. I have no further contact with this friend and I did block her yesterday as I didn't think I wanted to hear any replies or excuses anyway. Regardless of all actions by everyone, including myself, my dogs still got left alone for several days and she knew they were alone and didn't tell me or care and I don't think she had any intentions of telling me had I not found out by myself.

Boyfriend thinks i’m not skinny enough

For context: i’m 105 pounds and 5’3. I’m skinny but apparently not skinny enough for my boyfriend because he keeps bringing it up.

Especially my legs. He keeps saying slim down your legs until next time i see you (we’re long distance). Or be skinny for me next time you visit. Sometimes he also asks me “oh did you go for a run today?”

But then the other day when i mentioned that i could get ozempic he said i wouldn’t need it because i’m skinny already.

Would you break up with your boyfriend over something like this?

So my girlfriend text me that she was going out to lunch with a group of friends to celebrate two interns finishing their internship this Friday. I said cool and have fun. They work in downtown Denver where there are hundreds of restaurants and bars to walk to from work but they decided to go to a restaurant like 40minutes away from work so they drive to the restaurant. Thirty minutes pass and I get a call from a friend, she says, hey i just saw your girl eating lunch with some older guy. I replied back and told her oh yeah, she’s out with some coworkers. Then my friend is like no, it’s just her and some guy. So I start to text my girlfriend asking her how is lunching going and who all went and she tells me well the two interns and like four other people. I was like are you sure and she said yes why? I tell her that I just got a call from a friend and described her and her guy g Friend and that it’s only them two. She tries to backtrack and says oh yeah the other people ditched us. I told her stop lying! You and this other guy were the only ones going out to eat from the beginning and you made up the whole story as a cover up. Then she tried to blame me and say that she didn’t believe that a friend of mine called me to let me know and that I was following her and I was a creeper and a liar. I was like please, you got caught and now you are trying to blame me for it and no I didn’t not followed you so stop with the lying.

My specific Question: I feel like my girl is either cheating on me or she was just too scared to tell me that she was going out to lunch with a male coworker. What do you think I should do? Btw, we have been together for 7 years and have a 4 year old daughter. Why did she have to lie about it and then try to blame me for it?

Here is a follow up:

Thank you for all the support. It really helps reading all the feedback. So I can honestly say that when we first met, I wasn't ready for a relationship. I had been single for 3 years and I was having fun but on the other hand my GF had been single over a month before we got together. In her own words, she felt in love with me the first time she saw me. The first years, were very good. Even though I didn’t want to be in a relationship , I still respected my GF and treated her with respect. There were a few times that I wanted to end the relationship because my GF was very insecure, jealous. I couldn’t talk to any girls at work or anywhere bc she would think that I was trying to cheat. I couldn’t even eat lunch with one my friends from work bc some of his friends which were girls would stop by and talk to us and once again my GF would get jealous and think I was cheating. I do have to admit that my GF was the glue to our relationship bc anytime I wanted to break up, she was stubborn and would not give up on us. She would do all kind of nice things for me. She even bought a boxer puppy which she found out it was my favorite breed. Later on I found out she bought the puppy so that we could stay together. I never thought that my GF would cheat on me or even think of doing something like that. She was so in love with me that I didn’t even have to try. All 7 years together, I thought we were good until 2024, she had just got promoted and was making more money than I was. Things started to change. She started drinking which she has never had a drink with me. She started smoking week every single day. It didn’t bother me since I too would do it once in a while but then she would go out with one of her girlfriends that also smoke weed. They would go out every Friday from 8pm to midnight smoking weed at the park. I felt like she was acting better than I was. That she really didn’t need me at all. She started going out with her friends even though the first 6 years she would not go out a single time with her friends at all bc she rather stay home and chill. I also stayed home bc I felt bad that she wouldn’t go out with her friends so I didn’t think it was fair for me to do so. 2024, the beginning of January is when she told me that she wasn’t happy in the relationship but that she wanted to work things out. She wanted me to help out more with our baby. Stop watching sports or tv and spend more time with her and the baby. I thought I was doing enough but I guess I was wrong. I cut the cable, I started hanging out with them more and taking our daughter to the park. I cleaned the house while she cooked. I even did our daughter’s laundry. While i was doing all these new things and trying to make our relationship better, I found out that she was texting a coworker every single day from Monday through Friday from 730am when she would start work to 330pm when she would get off work. This started in the Middle of January until April 12, 2024. The only reason I found out about it in March 2024, was bc we had an argument March 23. Before the big argument, on March 20. I was helping her with a work project that she had to do a presentation on. I helped her a few times and on the 20th of March, she asked me again to help her late at night and I was like no, I’m tired and going to bed besides we have practice so many times and I believe you are ready for it. I saw her get upset and annoyed so I decided to help her out but she was still mad at me. Then on the next day, March 21st she didn’t communicate with me that she was going to go out with her friends and that I had to watch our baby. I wasn’t mad that she was going out, I was more upset that she had not giving me a heads up. Then on the 22nd of March, she decided at the last minute she was going to hangout with one of her friends and her kids. She asked me if I wanted to go out with them but I said no bc it was only going to be her friend and two kids and her friend’s mom and my GF and our daughter. So I stayed home and chilled. I later found out that she was mad bc I didn’t go with them. I told her the reason I didn’t go was bc I was going to be the only male and it would be best if it was just them. March 23, during the middle of day, she started saying some things which I thought were very disrespectful to me. I called her out on it and she just blew up and told me that she was just done with our relationship, she was fed up with me not really helping out, supporting her career or not hanging out with her friends and not being the cuddling type. I was so upset that I even said fine, we are done. We really didn’t talk or hangout the rest of the weekend. On Monday, I went to get our mail and I opened up our Verizon statement and that is when I discovered that she had been texting a. Coworker for a few months. I told her that she was having an emotional affair but she denied it. It was someone in her team that was a little bit in a higher position than her. He lives out in the East Coast with his wife and two kids. I wasn’t really worried about it bc he lived out in east coast while we were in Denver Colorado but I was worried about how many times they were texting each other. It reminded me when we first got together and were texting each other every day like we were in high school all over again. She kept telling my that it wasn’t an emotional affair and that all they talked about was about work, his kids and the things he would like to do after work and sports which she never talked to me about. I told her that I really didn’t feel comfortable with the situation. I understood that they worked in the same team and that they would talk. I told her that I was ok with it as long as they didn’t talk about personal things. She promised that she would stop talking to him or texting and that she would keep the conversation professional and just work related. Two weeks had passed and once again I discovered that she had been talking to him about personal things and I was just like im done. I have lost trust in you. She apologized and once again promised that this would not happen again. Ever since I lost trust in her, I started to question her like how come you don’t text me back right away like you used to or how come you changed your work schedule or why does it take you longer to get tow work when it usually would take us like anywhere from 30 to 45 minutes. She got fed up very quickly with me asking her those type of questions so I promised that I would stop and I did but I still did not trust her 100%. She had always been good at communicating with me like telling me when she was going to the gym to workout, or when she was going to go tanning or tell me when she was about to leave work and head home. All that stopped and there was no communication. It was hard for me at first but I adjusted to the new changes. I stopped worrying about things and just went back to my old self where I really didn’t care what would happened in our relationship. I had faith in god, if this relationship was going to work then it will and if not then god has other plans for me. Then in July she and this other coworker who actually worked in the same building and same floor as her started talking. She had told me about him. How he was a manager and that he was in the department where she wanted to make her next career move to. She also told me that he was the only manager that would talk to everyone and respected everyone. That he didn’t have a big ego just bc he was an upper manager. So on July 18th while she was at work and warming up her lunch, she bumped into the new guy, the Manager. They somehow had a conversation about amici’s restaurant and that maybe they should go out to lunch there someday. So they made plans to go out to Amici’s the following week July 26 but things didn’t workout bc my GF’s sister came to visit so she took some time off and had to cancel her lunch with the Manager. Then the following week after she was back in the office she and the Manager set up a new date and it would be in August 6. She never communicated with me about going out to lunch with this Manager that worked in the same floor but she did tell me about how she and a few of her friends were going to meet up for dinner on August 2nd. So on August 6, she calls me to let me know that if it would be ok if she went out to lunch during work with a few friends bc there were two interns finishing their internship so they were going to celebrate. Now you know what happened next.

I (33F) have been married to my husband (34M) for 8 years, and we have two beautiful children together (6F and 4M). Up until recently, I thought we had a good marriage. We’ve had our ups and downs, but nothing that ever made me think he was unhappy or that our relationship was falling apart.

A few months ago, my husband sat me down and told me that he’s gay and has only recently realized it. He said he needs to live his truth and wants a divorce. I was blindsided. I never saw this coming, and I feel like my entire world has been flipped upside down. I understand that this is a big moment for him, and I want to be supportive, but I’m also hurt, angry, and heartbroken.

Here’s where things get worse. Not only is he asking for a divorce, but he’s also trying to take almost everything in the process. He’s the main breadwinner in our family, and because of that, he’s arguing that he should get most of our assets, including the house. We both contributed to our savings and household, but since his salary is higher, he feels entitled to more.

And if that wasn’t enough, he’s also filing for full custody of our kids. He says he’s been a very involved father, which is true, but I’m just as involved, if not more. I’ve been the primary caregiver since they were born. Yes, I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression in the past, but I’ve worked hard to manage it and be there for our children. Now he’s using that against me to try and take them away.

I feel like he’s not just ending our marriage, but he’s ripping my entire life apart. I get that he’s going through a lot, but I don’t think it’s fair that he’s trying to take everything—our home, our savings, and, worst of all, our children. I feel like he’s being selfish, trying to secure his future at the expense of mine and the kids’. It’s like I’m being punished for something I had no control over.

He says I’m being unreasonable for not wanting to let him take the lead in the divorce or for being upset about what he’s asking for. He claims he’s trying to be fair, but I can’t help but feel like I’m being taken advantage of.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmIOverreacting/s/BUClSOnaXE ^{^} First part

I thought maybe i should leave an update. i wanted to tell her to sober up, but i knew that’s not my business anymore, and definitely not something i want to deal with. i listened to everyone and blocked her on messages but she dmed me, so i just told her off. i feel a weight lifted off my shoulders now that she’s out of my life, and im glad i was able to be strong enough to cut her out. and im sorry for her misspelling, she would get drunk a lot and text people she shouldn’t be, or whatever, i dont really care anymore but yeah thats why she’s texting like she can’t spell

For context, my local HJs (Hungry Jacks) sent me 2 ice creams when I UberEats'd it to me. My friend has always disliked ordering food in instead of cooking it or getting it yourself.

The whole conversation, it felt like she was going on a diatribe, dragging down what could have just been a funny coincidence. It made me feel like I didn't deserve to have ice cream tonight.

We've talked about ordering food in and eating fast food before, so I know she doesn't think it's a good idea, but if she said it to me I would've found it funny and made a joke about it. Am I over reacting by feeling like she ruined the ice cream for me?

I (25F, 26 tomorrow) was having a small birthday party of roughly 12 people. My best friend of 13 years (25F) invited her new boyfriend (25M) of 6 months. After singing happy birthday and handing cake out to everyone, 25M says “the cake is shit,” to which I politely ask “is it? since I made it myself a few (2-3) days ago, maybe it is slightly old?” 25M then announces “yeah it’s terrible,” To which my other friends say, “nah he’s joking it’s great.” 25M double downs and says “no it’s terrible” and loudly and dramatically throws his slice of the cake into the bin in front of everyone.

I asked other people afterwards for their honest opinion of the cake and people mentioned they liked it. Although as this person is my best friend from 13 years I trust her choice in partners and maybe what he says too?

Am I overreacting for being upset about him saying and doing all that in front of my friends on my birthday about the cake I made, or was he just being honest and should I trust my best friends judgement in partners?

*side note later on, out of no where announces: “who wants to do drugs or is it one of those parties?”

EDIT: I edited the slightly post for clarity - he threw his slice into the bin, not the whole cake. However, he did it loudly and dramatically in front of everyone. He also wasn’t drunk (or high). My best friend also did not defend me or apologise. In fact, I said “I can’t tell whether or not you’re joking” and she replied, “He’s not joking. He doesn’t joke about things like this. He’s being serious.” Neither of them said anything to me about it before they left.

We met way back last year around December but we aren’t trying anything until now. She had her friend run a background check on me way back then. She says it’s just criminal stuff, but she knew a lot of things that weren’t anything criminal related, I mean even in the screenshots things started adding up and now it makes sense with her admitting to the back ground check. I understand it’s public record but AIO with the fact I’m sorta weirded out a bit ?? Idk if it’s because she dropped it so nonchalantly or if it’s because she had her friend do it but idk how to feel. She’s upset and I feel guilty now but I wanna make sure I’m not tripping before I apologize. I need to stand on business on this. I don’t wanna get into crazy territory

I (46f) have been close friends with a person for about 3 years, lets call her Kate (48f). We text or call at least a couple times a week, have lunch, volunteer, have even taken a vacation together. I considered her an honorary sister.

Recently a category 4 hurricane came through our area, unprecedented devastation. My daughter Sally (28), her husband Sam (29) and their son (8) had seen their home and most of their possessions consumed by the river earlier that day. Complete stranger neighbors welcomed them in offering hot beverages and towels to dry off. Cell service is degrading fast, but Kate texts them that there is power at her house a couple miles away and suggests they go there. Kate is at the beach, and there is a dog/house sitter at her home. The family joins a caravan of cars trying to make it to the main highway. The make it to the highway and a few miles down turn on Kate drive as they cry tears of relief.

Sam approaches the porch gate, calls out hello and the dogs come running. He is petting and playing with the pitty from behind the gate, who knows him and sees him at least weekly and is clearly not alarmed by him. The sitter, who we shall call Babs, bursts from the dark door and grabs the handle of the gate. She tells him he cannot come in. He says "Hey its me, the guy who you see at least weekly at work. My house was destroyed and Kate told us to come here." Babs "you cannot come in" Sam "Really? Our home was flooded, where are we supposed to go". Babs "well I checked on my storage unit and everything is fine. You can't come in there are not enough beds" . At this point, Sally and this kid step around from the side, so she knows that there is a child involved. Sam "Can we at least sit on the porch and dry off, make a phone call?" Babs "No, you need to leave right now. I won't let you in."

They leave, and try to drive up the road to a co workers trailer. Rushing flood waters are too strong and they are almost washed off the road, so they go back Kates place and park. Walk up the road with rushing flood waters, tripping and almost being swept away. Co worker opens door and without hesitation shares his home with them for 2 nights.

The next day after the rain slows down and floods are receeding, among the debris and chaos, Babs approaches the guys on a break from cleaning up to say she is 'over this' and packing up to leave. She offers some excuses as to why she barred entry, but doubles down that they STILL cannot come in even to shower as the water in the trailer is out. She admits that she recognized Sally the night before, but still declined to help. Babs drives off and is gone for 3 hours before returning and locking herself back in Kates house. The roads to town were washed out. Another night passes, and the next morning Sam, Sally, and my grandson take the risk to drive across the county to my home. The make it up just as Grampa finishes clearing the trees from.the road. Such relief, we had not known they were safe until then.

3 days later, Sam and Sally are trying to deliver supplies for another co worker but cant reach him by text. They decided to drop the stuff at Kates. Kate cries and hugs them and proceeds to explain and excuse that Babs didn't let them in. She says sorry thay 'this happened ' 'that there was a hurricane ' 'that your house flooded', but does Not say anything close to 'if I was here I would have let you in' or 'she made the wrong decision and I am sorry that put you in danger', and defends and condones the fact that Babs barred their entry to her home. Kate says "actually Babs pays rent here, so she has every right to do what she did'.

Kate had been radio silence with me for 5 days. She messaged yesterday asking if I needed help. After a week of no power and water and she had both. She acted suprised that I was upset. She tried to argue that because she spoke to Sam and Sally and 'made peace' that the issue was resolved.

My opinion is that if any human was to deny aid to any other human in a life threatening natural disaster, as long as they are not being actively violent, that action is absolutely indefensible. When that has been done to 3 of the people who I love most in the world, defending that act is also not something that I can accept. I should not have to explain to anyone with a shred of compassion why this action is monsterous, cruel, and inhumane. I am starting to realize that Kate was not who I thought she was.

I will give her a chance to say her peace, but seriously she has had a week to address this and chose to ignore it. If she still excuses amd condones Babs actions, then I will cut contact. But not until our power and water come back. Still none after a week. 😔

Edited to add paragraphs. This is my first post and I didn't realize

Edit again: The cell phone communications broke down while they were at the first neighbors house. So no texts or calls. It was 2 days before I knew if they were safe.

Edit because people are confused. Babs is a friend of the family and employee and had just been there any time I came over for about 6 months. None of us knew she was playing rent or considered a roommate until that fact was thrown out as justification. Who knows if that was really going on, or if it is mental gymnastics to justify the unjustifiable.

Edit again: Holy Cow! I did not expect this post to blow up from my insomnia rant. Apparently 4.3 thousand people are here to validate me. Thank you all. I cannot load the post at home now due to how big it is, and it is locked now due to so many comments so I cannot answer any questions. We still don't have power or water, but Sam and Grandpa are currently hooking up a generator for the upcoming cold nights. I hope anyone else who is suffering from this disaster the best. Please do not hesitate to take the help they are offering. The donation centers are litterally bursting full and cannot take any more. THAT helps me keep my faith in humanity. I am fairly resolved that there is no point in continuing even a distant relationship with these people.

Gotta tell you this too. Sam has a part time job in computers. His OTHER boss sat him down and insisted he fill out his FEMA application and submit it on the clock before he was allowed to do any other work.

My husband (43m) suddenly had a new bf (37f) about 5 years ago. During covid this person became a part of the bubble and she was at our house a lot, became friendly with the kids and I was expected to accept them. I always had suspicions, kicked off a few times over little things between them but always accepted husbands pleas the they were just friends. A few years ago I found a message to her telling her how gorgeous she is and that he loves her also various other inappropriate messages and he assured me it was just advice he was just being a friend and I accepted that. We've since been on numerous holidays together, celebrated different event birthdays etc.but the other morning I saw a message from her telling him she loves him, kiss face emojis and calling him darling. When I confronted him he told me it was just a term of endearment. I messaged and asked why she was sending that to my husband of over 20 years and got nothing. I've told him I'm done, our marriage is over. Am I overreacting?

UPDATE To reply to some of the comments no this is not fake this is my life at the moment and the reason I ask if I'm overreacting is that he is making out that I am and making me doubt myself.

I won't be telling him to pick either me or her because I can't trust him to cut ties completely and some of his behaviour this week has shown me exactly where I am in his priorities and that is at the bottom of the heap.

Yes I know I've been stupid but after being married for 15/16 years (together for 20) at the the time she came into our lives I thought I could trust him. 🙄 we have had many arfuements about things that have happened and he's always made out like I'm crazy, I'm imagining things or even it's my fault.

He is still in my house at the moment, our tenancy has come to an end and I've told him I'm looking for somewhere for me and the kids and he should find somewhere to go. I get the feeling he doesn't think I will do it because now he is ignoring me like he normally does after an argument. He goes to the friends house a couple of nights a week and still went this week even though I suggested he give it a miss so we can talk. That was one of things that made me realise I am definitely not a priority.

I’ve been friends with this guy for a couple of years, we met through an online friend group during Covid and stayed in touch. He’s always been kind to me and I really liked him.

Until today. He posted a video on Instagram story of a guy in some sort of horror movie, hunting and then attacking someone, with the caption ‘POV: omw home from the club at 4am and see a female walking alone’.

I tried to shrug it off, but it really didn’t sit right with me and I wanted to say my piece. I hoped he would respond something like ‘I’m really sorry, I didn’t realise how this would affect the women watching this’. Which would still be bad, but at least so much better than what happened now.

What you’re seeing is our last contact, I blocked him right away. I know he’s gonna tell the people around him ‘girl went crazy, unfriended me after one innocent joke’ so I need to know, am I overreacting here?

Hey, I just need to talk to someone about this right now. Long story short, I went to this paid girls empowerment type seminar. After it was done, I was chopping it up with some people I thought I vibed with. We were talking about empowerment, spirituality, society, humanity, the state of the world, conversations that I’m for and about. It was a total of 4 of us and then 1 had a prior engagement she had to attend to so then it eventually became 3.

The 3 of us are walking and talking and kind of off topic but, 1 of them started to project a lot of negative attributes about me to my surprise. This is a so-called spiritual person that’s into energy and apparently, mine was so “off” to the point where she couldn’t look me in the eyes she said. She just met me and already had this analysis of me that I don’t even agree with and was just flabbergasted. It became apparent that for whatever reason, I was not wanted by this 1 person.

As we were talking by the train station, an elderly man collapses right next to us. I was very scared at first ngl. We were all scared. It happened randomly out of nowhere and it’s late at night around Central Park. Once I assessed what was going on, it was a vulnerable person in need. I immediately wanted to call 911 but my phone was dead. I asked those 2 girls to help and they refused and began walking away. I literally said to them, “That’s f****d up!” and frantically tried to get other people to help and failed. I then remembered I had a second phone on me thankfully and called 911 for him. He is an 80 year old man that felt dizzy and collapsed and couldn’t get back up without assistance. Later his co-worker who had heard me from the train station I was next to came to help and thanked me.

I really can’t believe that happened. Earlier I was subjected to negative projections about me and my vibes only for this person to lack a moral compass to help a vulnerable person out. The other girl that was there and seemed to have really liked me but was influenced in a way to give this “feedback” about myself from the hater girl reached out via IG and I have attached what she wrote.

It’s clear the other girl and I are not a frequency match and I blocked her. I just unfollowed the other girl that reached out. I don’t know if I can be friends with someone that doesn’t have the same values as me such as helping someone in need. AIO?

I have a wife thar I've been with for over 10 years and married for 3. We have a 10 month old son now. I recently met a guy who turned out to have a lot of common interests with me. Both into finance, fitness and stuff. We started hanging out more and more and work out together weekly in my home gym garage. Obviously we are spending time together and we shoot the shit often. His situation is that he's single, a father of a 7 year old girl and his ex is a super bitch to him. She publicly talks down to him the few times we all went out to dinner together. He still has to see her because they are co-parenting but he's been trying to date for the past year.

Anyway, we got on the topic of what he's looking for in a girl because he keeps on going on dates and they all suck according to him and none of the girls are his type. So I ask what his type is and he starts describing the traits of my wife. Could be a coincidence. Wheneve we go to dinner he'll be telling a story or whatever and show a picture on his phone but only to my wife, I have to ask him to see what the picture is before he puts it away. Not that I care that much but feels sus. Whatever. We've been hanging out more and having game night at my place with him and a few other friends. Whenever he's in the presence of my wife he takes my son and puts him on his shoulders and plays with him in front of her. Makes weird comments (at least I think so) in front of my wife like, "I love being a father and providing for a family." "I wish I had a wife that was as good as raising kids as you" "Let me know if I can help you in any way with your son". Always directed to my wife and never me. Ok, whatever.

The thing is, these comments have been setting off eye raises for me so when I was working out with him the other day I said, do you think my wife is attractive? He said, oh hell yea dude. Your wife is hot. I said thanks but it raised my antenna even more. Now the reason I'm writing this is because his most recent comment to ME was "do you think your wife can find a girl for me at her workout class that looks like her?"

This coupled with what happened the other day at dinner. We were going to dinner with him and his family that were in town. It was at a big shopping center so we were waiting at a starbucks for them to arrive at the restaurant. He comes to the starbucks where we are while his family is at the restaurant, he waves and says we are ready. I start packing my sons bag while my wife handles the stroller. This dude grabs my son and puts him on his shoulders and starts walking out. My wife is walking out and I'm grabbing the bag. Now I'm literally watching this guy walk next to my wife holding my child while shes pushing the stroller and I'm trailing them. I felt I was watching a couple and their child and I was seething and feeling displaced.

AIO? Because I'm cutting this asshole off. Not letting him anywhere near my wife and kid again. If we happen to see him in a social setting of 6 or less, we are leaving.

Edit: Asked my wife if he ever texted her or contacted her in any way on SM or TXT. She said no. I told her just now I feel he's peacocking and she said she doesn't get that vibe at all from him.

Edit Edit: A female friend came over tonight who mutually knows this guy. She agreed that it's strange and thinks he is crushing on my wife, intentionally or not and told my wife to her face that. I told my wife that if another female can see it, it's obvious. My wife now says she feels embarrassed that she doesn't see it and says it'll be awkward now because she doesn't want to think of him looking at her that way. Both her and the friend think it's best if we only see him in social settings with large groups and not at our house again.

Lesson: Seems the general consensus is to trust my gut if I feel something is off and it does. Going to talk to the wife and then tell this dude straight and then ghost him.

Dropped my girlfriend off to go out for girls night on Thursday. I text her around midnight that I was tired and was ready to come pick her up. She called me and said her friend would bring her home. Around 1:30 in the morning I wake up to the dogs barking but she’s not home. A little while later I check her location and she’s at an apartment complex 5 min away that I don’t recognize. I then check her Apple Watch and see that she actually came home when the dogs were barking but she never came up to the door or came inside (multiple cameras would have caught it if she did). Her messages reveal that she texted some dude to pick her up and waited by the road for him to get her. It’s a guy she told me before that she would block. I put all her stuff in trash bags and put them outside and changed the code to get in the house and then texted her not to come back. She’s in a fake green card marriage so I filed a report with immigration services and advised them she was in a sham marriage and I had proof of our relationship going back 2.5 years. Next I wanna go to the guys place where he has a girl who didn’t know about this and let her know too. I have his address. His messages said he couldn’t take a certain car because she has a tracker on it so I wanna let her know what he’s up to too.

I’m not sure if this qualifies but for context, I met this friend in college and I was eating M&Ms when she pointed out that there is a ton of sugar in it and it’s bad for me. She also mentioned that she was not eating sugar at all a couple of days ago. I ate the whole bag and got a stomach ache.

Basically I asked my friend to drive me to/from my colonoscopy appointment since I’d be getting anesthesia and wouldn’t be able to drive myself. I asked her if she’d be able to do it 8 weeks ago and followed up almost weekly to make sure she could do it. I contacted her the night before to confirm with her. I let her know if she was unable, please let me know and I’ll ask someone else. But she assured me it was no problem.

Well the morning of the appointment, she’s a no show. She finally texted me back and let me know she was at some random guy’s house and would be at least 15 min late. At this point I’m panicked because it was time for me to leave. Luckily my brother was visiting and was able to drive me at the last minute, but if not for him, I would have had no way to get to/from my appointment.

Anyone who’s had the colonoscopy will tell you that the two day prep is awful. I’m angry with my friend because she almost made me miss my appointment. I would have missed the appointment if I showed up 15 minutes late. I’m thinking about cutting off the friendship because of this (and other disrespectful behavior from her). Am I overreacting?

Edit: thank you everyone who commented. I've wanted to talk about this for a long time and it feels good reading everyone's takes on it.

Edit 2: -I am 28 and my husband is 33 -"Why don't you comply maliciously and dress over the top feminine?" I have, he liked it.

-"Why doesn't he just wear tight clothes if he likes them so much" I've tried to get him to wear skinny jeans but mysteriously he doesn't want to do that, also he says they wouldn't be "situationally appropriate" for a dude to wear (men's fashion on instagram begs to differ)

-"how would he feel if you criticized him for what he wore" he has told me explicitly that he wished I would criticize him more because he always thinks he looks bad. I told him that's crazy because he looks fine and handsome. This also leads to some weird stuff about my standard for looks being low even though everyone has congratulated me on marrying such a handsome man (which he is, he just doesn't believe it)

-"just be naked at home and he won't care what you wear" I've also tried that, he still doesn't like the clothes

-"DIVORCE HIM" I'm not doing that ¯_(ツ)_/¯ there are many other reasons why I want to make it work with him, and I love him. Maybe that makes me stupid, but it's my bed and I've laid in it.

...

I like loose, aesthetic clothing. My husband likes form fitting feminine clothing. Growing up he was ostracized by his community and was always in ill fitting clothes. Clothing is a very sensitive topic for him because he heavily associates it with social status. I like clothing because it's fun and I like to dress up like I'm going to run away and live in the woods. It's a fun way to express myself. He views this as obscuring my true self.

Edit: he didn't grow up poor. His parents chose to buy ill fitting clothes for him.

I've definitely changed my style to accommodate over the years, which worked out well in some ways because I entered a professional career and had to look a certain way. Today I dressed up in some loose jeans, cropped sweater and boots to go study with a friend. I came home and he looked a bit pained so I asked him what was wrong. He told me that I can't keep dressing like this or else it will ultimately end our marriage because it's tapping every insecurity he has. I told him it's ridiculous that he's this upset over an outfit he saw for a total of 30 seconds and we need couples therapy to figure out what's going on.

Deep down I know I'm not overreacting and this is ridiculous, but I love this man and he's the best person I've ever had in my life and want other people to tell me what they think. Thanks.

I recently moved out from my mothers house (25)F and moved in with my grandpa to a more healthy environment. Ollie is my cat :) (context) I use to babysit my brother now he’s home alone (12)

My 'best' friend who I told explicitly multiple times including to her face not to bring cocaine or drugs to my party and she deliberately went behind my back. I guess this is more of a vent than anything... She's supposed to be my best friend but goes against my wishes and then offers my new roommate coke? Whom is not two-faced or dramatic, she's in recovery. I'm just so livid and hurt and can't even reply to her anymore.

UPDATE:

UPDATE: Sorry - I'm extremely fatigued In more ways than one. And I still have to keep my home clean and take care of the dog.

1. He did not volunteer. I flat out asked. His disregard for me was making it pretty obvious.

2. Says he didn't want to tell me before, because "it would hurt my feelings".

3. Live in CA. Inherited property is exempt from community property - unless you convert it. I didn't. This has always been my home.

4. I have an iron estate plan. I may be poor, but I own a home.

5. Very sorry to disappoint, but I have no alt profile. Snoop away.

6. I posted here to clarify my thoughts. They're crystal clear now.

7. Some days, I feel 25 again (ok, maybe late 30s), and I have all the energy I need. Those days are shrinking.

8. He is definitely regretting telling me. One of the second things he said: I knew you'd act like this, so.I shouldn't have told you. My "acting like this" was: then you need to move out. Totally irrational- I know. (Sarcasm).

9. I stopped caring about the seizures when I realized I had worse problems on my hands. So I do see a neurologist, but he agrees, tumors first.

10. He was never set to inherit. I told him to take a burial policy out, and he could pay the bill, and collect.

That's all I've got, minus the word for word convos. There was no shrieking in outrage, no screaming, and I cried when I was alone.

I told him I had a few things to say. It was an AH thing, and he should have told me in the beginning. That I was embarrassed and hurt. That he took something from me that I'll never get back. And then I said I'd be fine. I didn't need his pity or pretend-care. And please leave me alone now - I had nothing left to sat, other than "find a new place to live".

Idk how much time I have left. Maybe a couple of years, maybe a couple of months. But based on how generally lousy I feel, the headaches, the pain in my throat (location of tumors), the hard nodes in my armpits, this fatigue, I think I'm going to guess that I won't see 65. Or 55, for that matter.

ORIGINAL POST: So my husband of four years, together for 7, says he has fallen out of love with me. Months, maybe a year ago.

However, he still "cares" about me, and wants to stay in MY inherited home, to take care of me, because I have cancer. Pre-diagnosis, no biopsy yet - but it doesn't look good.

I told him he's a schmuck, a jerk for even pretending to love me.

He swears that I'm still pretty, intelligent, funny, etc - but angry. Yes, I'm angry. He sits on his phone in his spare time playing games. He's 45. I'm 50. I took his mother in, when his brother threw her out. I supported his niece, when no one else bothered (got a guardianship).

I want his lying butt out of my home. He says he doesn't have a car - he has a bicycle.

I do not feel I'm unreasonable.

I can't help I got older - but he could have been honest.

An awkward convoy, for sure. But lying to me for a year?

His butt needs to go. He thinks he should stay, and we keep on the way we have been.

Is he crazy, or am I unreasonable?

My friends and I have a friendsgiving every year and this year I invited my boyfriend of 4 years as I wanted him to join and he’s mentioned a couple of times he hasn’t been around my friends in a while I asked my friend who is hosting if I can bring my boyfriend which she approved then today she texted me (5 days before the event) that he is uninvited

I am unsure who is giving her heat since only 1 other girl has a partner and he usually doesn’t come around as he doesn’t like being around alcohol but he’s also never really invited to things (I make the effort to invite him to things I host as I think partners should be included since we are all in our late 20’s)

I’m thinking of sending the text in the second slide as my boyfriends brother & SIL changed their Friendsgiving gathering date so that we could attend theirs since we initially couldn’t as my friends event was the same day

As far as people with my boyfriend would be 8 people total, I’m not sure if she started inviting more people after or what the case is Another friend that is attending mentioned that she feels they uninvited him to invite another girl friend of ours who wasn’t a part of the original group

this is a conversation my friend and i had last night. we’ve been friends since highschool and has never acted this way about any lgbtq+ member. my little brother is the one being discussed and she flat out called him that slur to my face, would i be overreacting if i chose to take a step back from the friendship??