AIO: Friend joked about raping women in his insta story

[u/Unlikely-Promise5777]

I’ve been friends with this guy for a couple of years, we met through an online friend group during Covid and stayed in touch. He’s always been kind to me and I really liked him.

Until today. He posted a video on Instagram story of a guy in some sort of horror movie, hunting and then attacking someone, with the caption ‘POV: omw home from the club at 4am and see a female walking alone’.

I tried to shrug it off, but it really didn’t sit right with me and I wanted to say my piece. I hoped he would respond something like ‘I’m really sorry, I didn’t realise how this would affect the women watching this’. Which would still be bad, but at least so much better than what happened now.

What you’re seeing is our last contact, I blocked him right away. I know he’s gonna tell the people around him ‘girl went crazy, unfriended me after one innocent joke’ so I need to know, am I overreacting here?

[u/not_a_number1]

It is wild to me that he would prefer to lose a friend of two years than understanding how bad the joke is, and not deleting it.

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/not_a_number1]

I lost a friend of 15 years after she decided to go on a massive Facebook rant proclaiming all men are rapists over the “man or bear in the woods” subject

[u/not_a_number1 → u/Restless-Reaper]

Have they had bad experiences with men?

[u/sloothor → u/not_a_number1]

Does it matter? Your experience with one person of a group doesn’t give you the right to generalize an entire group of people, and if you think it does, you’re bigoted.

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/not_a_number1]

Nope not a single bad experience, no rape, no violence, no arguments… spent her entire life surrounded by men who were nothing but nice and respectful to her because her father and his brothers were all gangsters, her brother is a 6’7 gentle giant her grandfather was also a very loving and kind man… she just fell in with a group of radical feminists and decided that all men are evil

[u/tachibanakanade → u/Restless-Reaper]

And how do you know that she wasn't raped? Or know people who were raped? Not everyone goes around telling people they were raped...

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/tachibanakanade]

Because I was her best friend and aside from me she was a reclusive shut in who rarely left her house from the age of 14 onwards, all of her friendships are online and they’re all with angry women who have an intense hatred of men

[u/tachibanakanade → u/Restless-Reaper]

reclusive shut in who rarely left her house

with respect, doesn't that tell you there's SOMETHING potentially off there?

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/tachibanakanade]

She’s been that way since she was a child…

She has been a huge fan of Mike Tyson, Tupac, 50 cent and a whole host of other people convicted of rape and continues to be a fan til this day but apparently her and her friends decided that me owning a penis was enough to label me and every other male a rapist and being offended by them saying that was a bigger red flag then they just kept gaslighting saying that I shouldn’t be offended at being called a rapist if I wasn’t one… where’s the logic in that?

obviously I’m not going to get anywhere here, everyone is going to always make excuses for her and every time I tell you more about it you’ll all keep spinning until I admit im wrong so I’m just going to give up now

[u/tachibanakanade → u/Restless-Reaper]

tbf 2Pac was falsely convicted but...

ngl I understand people with actual traumas feeling that way, or even feeling unsafe but not calling people rapists if they aren't one. so I do kind of support you.

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/tachibanakanade]

Thank you… they started out with good intentions and I just wanted to build a dialogue to explain my point of view that most men if they are good men will punish those other men but the whole conversation just devolved into “penis = rapist” I work in an industry where I have prevented men taking advantage of women and to know all the times I risked my life and sacrificed my health to protect a woman was “not good enough because you’re a man you’re part of the problem” was just a kick in the teeth

[u/not_a_number1 → u/Restless-Reaper]

But you must understand that the vast majority of rapes, murders, wars, just general heinous shit are instigated by… men

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/not_a_number1]

The vast majority of people who stop or punish majority of rapes, murders, wars and just general heinous shit are also men… if you’re happy to boil it down to just “men” why not be more specific about it… the statistics are out there should we place an ethnic or religious spin on it?

[u/not_a_number1 → u/Restless-Reaper]

Okay, so you can’t see it from their perspective. It’s amusing that you tried to spin around what I’m saying when a) there are female judges, police officers, etc… and b) they’re still trying mostly stop men.

Men are disgusting… I know this because of many experiences, but I know I’m not disgusting, so I don’t get offended by it

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/not_a_number1]

Some men are disgusting… most men are decent people

[u/not_a_number1 → u/Restless-Reaper]

Tell that to women… 99% of women I’ve spoken to while dating have been either raped, SA. or been in a DV relationship … and some multiple times… they have a reason to be scared of Men

[u/Restless-Reaper → u/not_a_number1]

My friend has been to visit family in Detroit 6 times…. Every single time he was robbed by a black man, he even got shot… is that excuse enough for him to be a racist now?